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Its never a dull day in Politics when that great sage of the swamp Daddy Duckwit (Phil Robertson) decides to pull on the waders and jump feet first into the election run of his close relative Zach Dasher.

In an ad Duckwit Snr filmed for the campaign, the Swamp Sage states:

Hey, Louisiana: Bibles and guns brought us here, and Bibles and guns will keep us here. Zach Dasher believes in both. That’s why I’m voting for him.

https://www.youtube.com/...

So..... Bibles and Guns brought Louisiana "here". And where exactly is that you may ask.

Well.....follow me beyond the orange growth of Spanish Moss, and lets see just where Bibles and Guns brought Louisiana

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If there is one thing the right wing echo chamber of lies and hate is good at producing, especially in the US, its hateful poisonous loudmouths who seem to deliberately troll any old current affairs subject and say the most outrageously disgusting stuff to feed their own narcissistic need to be in the spotlight for a few seconds more.

Lets face it, king of the poison pit has always been Rush Limbaugh. This modern day Father Charles Coughlin can turn even the most innocuous matter into a right wing battle cry for the Tealiban, laced always with a heady noxious brew of stupidity, bigotry, hate and lies.

But there just beneath him curl like pit vipers a whole passel of poisonous pals.....Beck, Malkin, Hannity, O'Reilly....and of course that stick thin harridan of hate Ann Coulter. Wherever human compassion and morality sees an issue, or some bright flicker of light brightens an otherwise grey and overcast day, there she is picking at its rotting corpse like a hellish harpy, screeching and sneering.

Whether its a hashtag campaign to try to gee up support for the effort to get missing girls back from their kidnappers, or little kids fleeing hellish violence and seeking asylum in the US, a country they think is safer, you can be sure that Harridan Ann will be there spitting bile, hate and lies.

Well this time, in my humble, she has crossed the line one time too many. Read this from Raw Story: http://www.rawstory.com/.... Be warned....you may need a bucket close by.

Yes....thats Ann suggesting your troops start to shoot to kill those kids crossing your border, and possibly also bombing the hell out of towns across the border to teach those damn brown skinned freeloading moochers a lesson. Bad enough by any measure, but when you have heavily armed groups of meathead racists and trigger happy militia men heading south from Bundyland so they can play bully boy with the brown kids that screech just may turn into shots and a stack of dead kids.

After all.....remember Billo and his "Tiller The Baby Killer" rants? Look how that worked out.

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Well, some enterprising young journos over at the Houston Chronicle managed to get their hands on a draft copy of the 2014 Texas Republican Party Platform, and boy oh boy....its a doozie!

Seems down there in the Lone Braincell State the GOP is now full on Bircher run Tealiban, given its 100% Pure seal by the Religulous Reich, and sponsored by Alex Jones' InfoWars and Glenn Beck's The Blaze.

Have you got an insane, extreme and delusional fear or paranoia about a subject? Well the Texas GOP has the platform for you!

Follow me over the orange squiggly sanity divide as we tiptoe through the tulips into Total Insanity Land.

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Mon Jun 02, 2014 at 05:38 AM PDT

Joe's Low Blow

by Dave The Sandman

In the ever changing wingnut welfare funded tag team event that is America's Most Poisonous Pundit a few names dominate the ring. Rush "Jabber The Gut" Limbaugh wobbles around like some bile spewing Sumo wrestler. Twitchy Michelle Malkin occasionally jumps in with her trademark Venomous Lamprey Of Doom finishing move. Then we get Anne Coulter stalking around the ropes like an anorexic Black Widow while she stabs opponents in the back. And always, from the sidelines, Simple Sarah The Quitter From Wassilla hee haws and brays like a brokeback donkey who has swallowed a three dollar fiddle, while doin' a little winksy folksy commentatin'.

Occasionally though a pretender to the throne runs on from the sidelines. Krayzee Chief Kessler mounts the ropes and calls the crowd a pack of commie dicksuckers. War Crimes West blunders through while hunting for commies and nazis under every seat, using his fat square head to butt opposition in the guts. Craven Cliven Bundy chucks a dead calf at the crowd, then ducks for cover behind his posse of psycho gun nut pals. Duckwit Daddy Robinson mugs to the camera, waves his bronze age book of fairy tales and does a little FakeBilly Whitesplainin' while quack quacking away on his toot toy.

But most recently the spotlight has fallen upon The Original Pretender, everyone's favorite fake fathead and pretend plumber.....screaming into the ring like Leeroy Jenkins on crack.......heeeres JOE!

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Sat May 24, 2014 at 05:00 AM PDT

If It Walks Like A Duck.....

by Dave The Sandman

Well, I guess Phil Robertson, Duckwit paterfamilias and in house preacher to his shabby camo clad clan of yuppie Faux-Billies thought that the dust had settled. He thought the Eeevyl Librul Meeja Eye Of Sauron has shifted its attention away, drawn by the new boy in town freak show carnival barker Cliven Bundy or the equally idiotic and psychotic Operation American Spring Fail clownshow.

So Daddy Duckwit thought it was safe to get back to his favorite Sunday pastime ... spewing self righteous god n guns gay hatin' bigotry to his audience of fellow bronze age death cultists.

WRONG! WE CAN SEEEEEEEEE YOU!

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Im observing this cackfest court case, as are many of my fellow tea sipping pith helmet wearing countrymen, with rotating combinations of slack jawed amazement and snorty nose sniggers. I saw yesterday, with some slight relief, a positive shift when one of the judges played a little with hypothetical possibilities as a result of the case swinging in the favor of Hobby Lobby and its claimed right to disregard sections of law based on "sincerely held faith", thus extending the narrow definitions of right and wrong based on superstitions and faith held by the company owners all the way down from the boardroom to the bloke who holds the doors open and packs bags at the checkout.

Their argument seems to be "I own the company, so this whole company, its assets, resources and employees are all to be considered (Insert My Faith Here)".

Strikes me as some twisted version of Mormons doing the hijack baptisms and making dead people Mormon. In this case its the owners making a whole company a member of their church.

So....ever one to play the game for the games sake, like a true Bit gent, lets play hypothetical what ifs.....

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Right now across the USA, and especially in Arizona where Janzilla just vetoed one hate the gay bill, and in Ohio where a similar bill was killed off yesterday before reaching a vote in light of the media and public outcry at goings on in Arizona, the Religulous Reich KristyHuns have set off the Outrage Foghorns and turned them up full blast.

Whine One One switchboards have been inundated with petulant whiny calls from butthurt Christian bigots screeching about how they are being persecuted by secularist anti-Christians, atheists, and all other supporters of the dreaded glitter and sequin adorned "gay agenda". Whole fleets of waaaaaaaahmbulances, specially outfitted with satellite feeds of looping Pat Robertson and Bryan Fischer fire and brimstone rants, are heading out to tend to the butthurt, top up their persecution complexes and feed their righteous outrage addictions.

Oh how they scream, rant and gnash their teeth. Religious Persecution they scream! You are hating on me for being a good god fearing Christian(tm). I am being persecuted for my Christian beliefs they screech!

Meanwhile, across the orange barbed wire separating Christian sado-masochistic persecution fantasy land from hard reality......

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Sometimes in this crazy world we live in it is the youngest members of our societies who stand up and remind us what true human decency, integrity, bravery and compassion are.

Sometimes it is they who re-affirm our hopes for a brighter future. One of a world less fraught by division and hatred, bigotry and injustice.

A few years ago it was one lone little 10 year old lad, Will Phillips, who refused to stand and recite the Pledge, stating that as gay people in the USA were second class citizens he wasn't going to recite that empty phrase "With liberty and justice for all" any more. Undaunted by threats from school, community, right wing pressure groups and the usual hateful anonymous internet scum Will continued with his protest, winning the day and standing his ground.

And today that duty and responsibility has been admirably taken up by the students of Eastside Catholic High School in Seattle, Washington.

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Now lets get this cleared up right at the start. Im not what could be called a moderate atheist. Im one of the ones who likes to point the finger and scream "J'Accuse!" And boy oh boy, when it comes to the many and various crimes and offenses associated with the Roman Catholic Church I was raised in I am more than happy to throw brickbats at the institution, its clerics, its members and its apologists.

BUT

At the same time I am the first to admit that for every cloud there is a silver lining, and that when it comes to socio-economic issues and policy, economics, wealth disparity and a raft of other topics involving social justice old Mother Church is not just spot on now in the hands of good men like Pope Frank, but has been for a long long time.

Over a century in fact....

Which is why these accusations from the mouths of scrabby right wing hatemongers like Varney and Limbaugh leveled against poor Pope Franky have me sniggering. Yet again the right wing in the US demonstrates its utter ignorance and that it collectively has a memory akin to that of a goldfish.

So here is a little lesson in the history of Catholic Church Social Doctrine.... and that's social with a massive slice of Socialism.

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Wed Oct 23, 2013 at 06:51 AM PDT

ODS : Mass Shootings Edition

by Dave The Sandman

What with all the non-scandals still flapping around like bats in the GOP belfry, and the inevitable clunky launch of the ACA website and services, it seems like Obama Derangement Syndrome (ODS) has reached epidemic levels amongst the low info electorate.

ODS, like some hyperactive strain of Ebola, now seems to just be infecting anything and everything the POTUS does, says or is in the vicinity of, be it the roll out of his landmark achievement as embattled president, or just some poor pregnant lass who when asked to stand through a pretty average to poor public appearance has a bit of lightheadedness (which according to the Jonesite death cultists is obviously a false flag).

But when there is a barrel whose bottom needs scraping through to the last splinters you can ALWAYS count on some cordite addicted psycho from the gun lobby to dig deep and let their full ODS spasms take hold. Sure as the sun coming up in the morning and going down at night, you can count on every time someone from the Obama administration mentioning in any way guns and gun violence, the RTKBA clown parade will find its voice and cry foul, finding some way to cough up gouts of ODS infected blood and bile on us the rational.

Follow me across the orange barbed wire fence of no mans land to read the latest as, like Hercules before us, we will try to find the stable neath the sh*t.

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Tue Oct 15, 2013 at 07:11 AM PDT

World War C

by Dave The Sandman

Well its that time of year again when the Birchbagger insane clown posse and evangelical death cultists of the US Religulous Reich wheel out the fainting couches, put on the pearls and twin sets or stars n stripes shirts and jumpers and get their collective mob on down at the laughably ironically named Values Voters Summit.

Summit?

yeah right....

Think Camp David with an IQ smaller than your shoe size.
More hate than a whole cross burnin season full of Klan rallies.
More bile than a shady backstreet Chinese Traditional Medicine store.
More distorted reality than a warehouse full of Funhouse Mirrors.
And more cries of God Wills It! than the whole frickin set of Crusades.....

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There is a lot of talk about the potential for a presidential pardon for poor Bradley Manning. Personally I think there are two hopes of that happening, and one of them is Bob.

There is also some discussion about the potential sh@t tsunami of GOP Faux Nooz BirchBagger outrage Obama would face should he follow that highly unlikely path and actually do the decent thing.

But hey.....maybe someone should give your dear university star pupil Pres a reminder of history.

After all, its not like there aint precedent cases

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