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Thu Jul 17, 2014 at 08:30 AM PDT

The Captain's a Ni*BONG*

by Hannibal

First we get a female Thor, now the mantle of Captain America is being taken up by a black man. Seeing such actions as this, as well as having Heimdall played by the amazingly talented Idris Elba, one has to ask: Is this all just coincidence, or is Marvel intentionally trolling the fuck out of rightwingers? Either way, the teabaggers can take it up with Thor.


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So I've had this tooth (Lower left wisdom tooth) that's been decaying and rotting for more than a decade. I remember the first piece broke off the day before my great-grandmother's funeral, back in 2004, while down in Algadones, Mexico, eating tacos and drinking beer, because that's just how we roll. Anyways, pieces of it have been breaking off for years, with the occasional toothache. Usually some Ibuprofen and a Z-Pack (Broad spectrum antibiotic) would deal with it. But I avoided the dentist for a long time. Over 25 years actually, which I suppose is generally not a good idea. So anyways, the week before Christmas, toothache. Ibuprofen, and Aceteminophen, and a Z-Pack couldn't quite deal with it, but the pain mostly subsided. But I persevered. Saturday, the gums on the outside of that tooth swelled up all huge, which was freaky. So more antibiotics, more pain relievers, and a desperate search for a dentist consumed much of my weekend.

Apparently dentists don't like working on the weekend, understandable, but annoying. Not even 1-800-Dentist could help me. So I kinda just dealt with it, hoping there'd be no fever or anything. Got a dentist to see me this morning, and after X-Raying, he said he was really glad I came in, and wished I'd come in sooner. There were lots of words he used, abscess, dead nerve. The abscess was dangerously close to some nerve that goes along the inside of your jaw, and is really important. So he referred me to an oral surgeon.

Now, the oral surgeon had to not only yank the tooth, but also cellate, or whatever that word is, the abscessed area, because of the infection. He repeatedly tried to make the local anasthetic work, because they knew I was paying cash, and would be walking home. But no matter how much they tried, no matter how much the rest of my mouth was numbed out, that tooth was still agony to touch. For those who don't know, infections can render something like a local anasthetic useless, the acid in the infection reacts to the anasthetic, and it just doesn't go. That part of it was a rather painful experience, since they'd test things out, jamming something hard against the tooth to see if the local had done its job. Ouch, and bleeding.

Luckily, I was able to get a hold of a relative who lives nearby to give me a ride home, and then it was laughing gas time. First few breaths it didn't really do anything, but wow, that stuff kicked in real nice. They also ran an IV, loading up my body with something. So then, I went from breathing deep of the happy gas, to being semi-lucid and conscious. I've never been under sedation before, so it was a trip. It wasn't like what I expected. I expected it to be like sleep, maybe dream or something. But it was weird. Really weird. Breathing the stuff in, getting high and happy. Then bam, they were done.

They also were kind enough to give me a prescription for Percocets, and when I got home I took two. These things are really nice. This is my first experience with percocets, they're not like weed, which as we all know, is super happy fun time. This is more like, everything's just relaxed. An extremely welcome absence of pain.

I remember a time in my life, where I actually got a sort of rush from pain. Back in my youth, riding a skateboard like a maniac. Road rash was an exhilarating experience. Slamming staples in my arm was an amusing pasttime. Putting smiley faces on my arm was the biggest thrill pain though. Just an absolute rush. Like an angry orgasm. The burning flesh sending this wonderfully electric feeling through my body.

But you know what? As much as I enjoyed those life affirming pains, a toothache just fucking sucks. And I really enjoy these percocets. I wish I could share them with all of you, so you could all feel this wonderful high. But I can't, so instead, I'll share some lovely music.


Miles Davis was

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It's all over folks, this video, originally filmed in Super 8, depicts President Obama's birth, in Kenya.

For those who may not be able to view the embeded video, a direct link.

I'm not sure what all this means. Does McCain automatically become President, or does Biden? Or perhaps Boehner? And if it's one of them, who does Mitt Romney run against? Does this mean all of our plans for turning America into a Marxist Utopia are undone, or will the Republicans have to go through and find all of our secret Marxism and undo it?

There's so many questions, and so much disappointment, I'm just not sure what to do.


Are our plans for an Islamomarxist Utopia undone?

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Harley Davidson, that most American of American automotive companies, reported that, due to its 84% profit loss, that it's shutting the doors of its subsidiary, Buell Motorcycle Company. In this time of economic uncertainty, it is certainly understandable to try and trim the fat wherever possible, but this move will have long-term repercussions for the more than a century old Harley Davidson. The most innovative part of MoCo, Buell pushed engineering and design, while Harley, aside from its VRSC line, has stagnated, building bigger, heavier, and more and more poorly handling motorcycles. Harley might save money now, in the short term, but in the long run, they're going to die. I fear that the only thing that could have saved Harley was Erik Buell.

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Mon Jul 13, 2009 at 10:19 PM PDT

Birther Fail achieves new heights

by Hannibal

Orly Taitz, the lawyer/real estate agent/speaker of five languages/conspiracy theorist wingnut has reared her ugly head, and hilarious name, yet again. This time she's actually managed to get a major in the U.S. Army to file a lawsuit, and refuse to deploy to Afghanistan. I'd feel sorry for Major Cook, if he wasn't such a complete and utter tool.

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Thu Oct 23, 2008 at 09:31 PM PDT

CA-52 Mike Lumpkin rocks the debate

by Hannibal

As Mike put it:

We can elect a congressman's kid, or we can elect somebody who has the qualifications to deal with these issues.

That about sums up the race, Mike Lumpkin has the experience and know how we need. Junior offers nothing but serving as a puppet for his daddy. This race is winnable, as an internal GOP poll, which had previously shown Mike tied with Junior, and their latest showing Mike with a three point lead!

Visit Mike's website.
Mike's ActBlue page.

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Some good news for this race. Despite Lil' Duncan's attempts to duck out of debating Mike, he's now been shamed into three on-air debates! This is great news, as Lil' Duncan was previously attempting to use his father's campaign strategy of ignoring his opponent (Which was quite effective.) Now the people of the 52nd district will get the opportunity to hear from both, and make a more informed decision. I'm definitely looking forward to attending at least one of these. Hopefully more.

The first debate will be held at Cuyamaca College on the 22nd, in the Communication Arts Auditorium. The second debate will be held at Grossmont College on the 28th, but where on the campus hasn't been released yet.

Next in news for this race, CNN coverage! (YouTube link, embedding doesn't seem to work right now.)

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Sun Oct 12, 2008 at 09:27 AM PDT

CA-52: Like Father, Like Son

by Hannibal

Crossposted on Calitics

First, it was Duncan Hunter Sr. who would always refuse to debate. He was the incumbent Republican, in a very red district, so in a way that makes sense. But now his son is doing it too. Only his son isn't an incumbent, though he's trying to run like one. First, it was a debate hosted by the East County League of Women Voters, next, it was a debate on a conservative radio show, hosted by Rick Amato. Little Duncan Jr. apparently is terrified of facing off with his opponent, Commander Mike Lumpkin. This tactic of avoiding debates is undemocratic, and insult to the voters of the 52nd district. We deserve to hear from the candidates themselves.

It's a pattern, and an unfortunate one, of behaving exactly as his father does.

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The wait is finally over, we can all stop speculating on who it will be, the Obama campaign has announced its decision. No, this is not a Rick Roll, this is for real.


Obama's choice

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Crossposted on Calitics

That's right, in this reddest of red California districts, Mike Lumpkin has managed to turn this into a competitive race. Having raised over $300,000 to date, a record for any Democratic candidate in the history of this district, the retired Navy SEAL is turning this into a serious contest.

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Thu Jun 05, 2008 at 09:27 AM PDT

McCain rips off Hillary too!

by Hannibal

This is just insane, does McCain's campaign have an original thought in their fucking heads? First he rips off Obama massively, then his brilliant campaign staff thinks, "Hey, that Hillary slogan about being ready on day one was pretty good, let's steal that too!" I guess it's easier than actually having to come up with an original slogan of their own.

For those who don't want to actually have to visit McCain's website, here's a picture.

Since this is the direction of McCain's campaign, here's a few more previous campaign slogans he can rip off.

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At least he is according to a survey done by Rock The Vote, with help from TouchTunes, a maker of jukeboxes. The survey was done through the jukeboxes, in bars all across America from April 28 through May 11. Though it is something of a bittersweet victory, since he did tie with "None of the above." Though that might say more about Hillary Clinton and John McCain, both of whom trailed behind the top two choices. Finally, the Democratic party has a candidate people want to get hammered with.

More from the survey below the fold.


If you could have a beer with Obama, you'd have

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