Edward II, given "the Barbour treatment"?

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Tuesday September 04, 2012 · 3:27 PM PDT

2012/09/04 · 15:27

Edward II, King of England, died in 1327. He was allegedly assassinated by having a red-hot poker thrust into his anus.

His twenty-year reign as King was famously disastrous, marred by political distrust and military failures. Immediately after his abdication, Edward’s political enemies decided they could not afford to keep him alive.

While imprisoned at Berkeley Castle, a group of assassins confronted him at night and, according to rumor, murdered the former king by forcibly inserting a red-hot iron poker directly into his rectum. His public funeral was held the later same year, confirming his death to the people of England. It is said that when one visits Berkeley Castle today, Edward’s screams of agony can sometimes be heard faintly through the walls.

Edward II and Piers Gaveston, 1st Earl of Cornwall, were alleged by medieval chroniclers to be homosexual lovers. This rumor was reinforced in fiction, as in Christopher Marlowe's play Edward II. Some historians, such as J.S. Hamilton, have pointed out that concern over the two men's sexuality was not at the core of the nobility's grievances, but centered on Gaveston's exclusive access to royal patronage.

Now, I doubt that Mississippi's former Governor Haley Barbour is all that well-versed in British history. However, somehow this theme must have resonated with him, whether from Grotty Olde England or the Dark Side of Dixie. As kos quoted earlier today, Barbour offered his regret for something that didn't happen at the Republican National Convention. “While I would love for [Chris] Christie to put a hot poker to [President] Obama’s butt,” said Barbour of the RNC keynote speaker, “I thought he did what he was supposed to do.”

All, you know, except THAT...

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