When I was growing up, whenever I gave my dad a hard time about anything, one of his common admonishments was, “Just wait until you have kids of your own.” I didn’t get it and it didn’t really stop me from questioning his parenting skills or pointing out when I thought he was being unreasonable because, the truth was, I never wanted to have kids anyway and I just saw it as an empty threat.
Looking back, I can see it wasn’t meant to be a threat but just an observation that sometimes you can’t understand something unless you’re the one trying to be in charge and make the decisions.
So, I’ve never had a smart-alecky kid criticizing my rules and making my life difficult but about seventeen years ago I adopted a dog. I think she must have been what my dad was warning me about. She was a ten month old brown and white beagle-terrier mix. Her name at the shelter was Lil Bit and the thing that made me select her from all the other dogs there that day was the way she kept going up to the front of her cage to smile and wag her tail at me. I couldn’t look at her without wanting to smile right back at her. But I didn‘t think Lil Bit was a very dignified name and it didn’t adequately describe her huge personality. So, I took her home and named her Louise.
I quickly realized that of the beagle-terrier combination, she seemed to possess the worst traits of each breed. She had the annoying, incessant bark of a beagle (plus that unmistakable hound-y smell) and the terrier was fully represented by two little front paws that were like pickaxes. She was also as stubborn as a feral donkey. In the first few hours that she was in my house, she chewed a corner off of the coffee table. I spent a small fortunate in chew toys in the first 4-5 years because she was constantly trying to gnaw on something.
Life with Louise was always a little unpredictable. She was always getting into something. Her energy was boundless -- she was always in motion and difficult to keep contained. She was a wiggly blur but she still never failed to make me laugh. The many dog-sitters she had over the course of her life all fell in love with her and left me notes describing the way she would twirl around on her hind legs right before they set the food bowl down for her. Food wasn’t the only thing that made her happy, though. She always seemed to be in a good mood. In spite of all her negative traits, I don’t ever remember hearing her growl at anyone or anything. She wasn’t above whining at me if she thought I was being completely irrational about something but she never showed any anger. Over the course of her life, Louise lived with eight different cats and three dogs and she got along so well with all of them. They all seemed to love her too.
Louise passed away two weeks ago at the age of seventeen and a half. On top of everything else that I will remember her for, I will always remember her for all of the milestones she was present for in my life. She quietly and reverently helped me get through some really sad times, some family deaths and a really difficult break-up. As wild and as obstinate as she was, she could also be incredibly sensitive at times. We also celebrated some joyful times -- we spent several birthdays and holidays together and I will always remember her sitting on the couch next to me on election night in 2008 and 2012. She was the one I hugged and kissed and cried all over the minute they called the election for Obama. It won’t be easy getting used to life without her. She will always be the dog I will measure all other dogs by from now on. I know I will never find another one like her and, although that makes me a little sad, I mostly just feel lucky to have known her and to have had her in my life for so long.
