I am not going to Readercon, and this is why:
I find it practically impossible to listen to people talk intelligently and substantially without being part of the conversation. I live for intelligent and substantial conversation, and there are few chances to have one in daily life. Therefore, I tend to be that guygal at panel discussions. You know, the one who keeps interrupting. I didn't realize I was doing it; until recently I haven't been attended enough panel discussions at conventions to understand the proper customs and dynamics of the situation. I thought panel discussions were conversations.
I can't understand why people want to sit quietly and listen to other people have a discussion. If the panelists are discussing a concept such as "Dystopia as Utopia" (or whatever), the panelists are not "oooh, voices from on high!" to whom to listen raptly in silence. They're just people, and I want to be part of the conversation. On the other hand, if they're discussing a concrete topic on which they're the sole experts, such as "this is how we made this movie," well, I just didn't understand the dynamics of the "Q&A at the end of the talk" because it's a discussion, not a lecture! And, er, I'm not good at keeping my mouth shut at lectures either.
(Speaking of which, I continue my rambling after the squiggle.)
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