H/t to Kossak, John in Denver for encouraging me to write this diary.
January 19, 2024 was my one year anniversary of sobriety. I used to drink . . . a lot. My story was stress and a shitty life with a shitty job and a demented landlord who dumped his shitty work on me when he got suspended as a lawyer. That was after he sucked down the retainers and none of his clients wanted to pay me. Shitty. So, rather than being a sane, level headed person, I drank wine. A lot of wine. I managed to do a credible job but not what the clients wanted because, by most standards, their cases were losers. At the urging of the landlord who had his hand in every case behind the scenes, they made my life hell. I retired and drank more.
As I did when I quit smoking, I just decided one day to stop drinking. AA isn’t my thing. As with quitting smoking I first reminded myself what I was doing to my physical health, wallet, and state of mind and then I looked for an app. Some angel here, over a decade ago, wrote about the Quit Keeper app for getting off the ciggies. It worked like a charm and had I kept all the money I saved in my mattress, I’d be comfortable in a couple of ways. Sooo, when I decided it was time to give my liver and kidneys a break, I found Try Dry (Google Play) or Apple users can find it at Try Dry Apple Store— a British app which promotes dry January.
So, sure, I didn’t actually do most of Dry January last year but better late than never — or as my mother says, better never late. Oh, well. You start with short goals — mine was 3 days, then 14, then 21 (which surpassed the last time I tried to stop years ago). You move to increasingly longer intervals but there’s a point I really stopped thinking about goals other than making it to the first year. Oh, and the money I have socked away; $3,640 as of today.
What has changed? My skin looks better; my eyes aren’t yellow tinged; my energy is way up; I exercise by swimming at the Y and walking when it isn’t a frozen tundra out; my first medical exam/blood work in about 10 years (I thought it was 8) was quite good including kidney, liver, glucose, and cholesterol. Bone density test put me on my very first medication that’s long term to keep things from becoming dire. Otherwise I take Red Yeast Rice and Co-Q10 for cholesterol, B-Complex for being an old lady, and Calcium plus Vitamin D to go with the generic Fosanax.
The major improvement is my mood/attitude. I don’t need a crutch when I’m temporarily down. I clean, bake, knit, practice Duolingo French, work as a Deputy Registrar of Voters, and tend to an ailing partner, demanding Harry the Cat, and currently 9 amaryllis. I will start seeds on St. Patrick’s Day and then get into the yard again when the polar vortex and El Nino settle down. My partner drinks barely a glass of wine at dinner and I’m the one who buys it for him (they miss my daily stops at the package store). Being around alcohol doesn’t bother me in the least.
In many ways, I’m like millions of people; I can accomplish some things and procrastinate on others. I honestly believe that if I can stop smoking and drinking, loads of others can as well. I think the trick for both is to set very short term goals — like making it through x hours, then a day, then a couple of days, etc. I’ve read in multiple credible sources that if one waits about 6 minutes with a distraction even strong urges will pass.
I hope I’m not sounding like a born again because I’d really be bummed and have to make something decadent and devour it. If you are ready to stop or thinking about stopping, trust yourself and find a buddy or a family member you actually like and who isn’t judgey. If you need a transition and drink beer, there’s loads of non-alcoholic beers that actually taste good. I tried Athletic IPAs and really couldn’t tell the difference — but I was never a big beer drinker and now I have had 5 cans of a six pack in the fridge for over a month. My partner drank the one can. I’m dependent on my Sodastream for seltzer.
If you made it this far, thanks for reading. Dry February and Dry Spring are ahead if you choose. I have a load of partner related errands so if I don’t respond to the one or two who have read this diary, I will later. Ciao for now!