On Leaving Facebook

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Tuesday March 20, 2018 · 5:31 PM PDT

2018/03/20 · 17:31

There’s a discussion about reasons for deactivating FB here with people having lots of thoughts about why they never joined Facebook or only ever joined using false information. That’s all great and there are very important privacy reasons for staying off FB. But there are also reasons why some people have to join and why they do so under their legal names.

I commented here a few days ago that I was leaving Facebook. It would be more noble to say it was because of Facebook’s election behavior and horror at what a cesspit Cambridge Analytica is, but the reality is I’d deactivated my account three months ago with the plan to decide whether to delete it or not when the semester ends in May. I’d deactivated because FB was *too* good at keeping me in touch with friends (and friends of friends) and family. My mother was diagnosed before the holidays with stage 4 cancer and isn’t on Facebook so I became the go-to source for private messages from her friends and our family about her health. It was too much and stressing me out so I dreaded going on the site.

Which takes me back to why I joined. I became aware of FB about a year or so after it started when you still needed a college or university affiliation to join, but saw it as an undergraduate thing (I was in grad school at the time). I’m not into pictures and didn’t like the look of the interface or the fact that everyone who one connected with was called a “friend.” Things went on that way for a long time. It wasn’t that I didn’t use social media (I was an early adopter of Twitter), but felt fine about being left off of FB.

That changed 5 years ago when I became aware that Calls for Papers, conference panels and other important career related opportunities were all happening in my field via a FB group and I was missing out. I was on the job market and needed access to this information and felt I needed to be part of this community. I also felt I needed to use my “real,” professional name because that was my whole reason for joining. It worked and I got several conference papers and job leads out of it. Facebook also connected me with a huge community of women of color in academia across the world — connections and discussions that I am going to miss. This is all to say that I know there are people who have no option but to belong to FB, at least until something better with a critical mass of users comes along.

This is even more true in some parts of the developing world where FB has turned itself into the internet for its users in ways AOL only dreamed of doing.

My point in all this is to say this is not only the moment to congratulate ourselves on not having joined the site or for leaving / boycotting, but also to look at Facebook (and Twitter, Google and Amazon) and other sites that harvest our data and figure out how to start regulating them. This is all the more true of educational “learning management system” (LMS) platforms that are gathering data on K-12 and college and university students who have no option but to use them.

I’m writing this because I want to know what’s going — how we can respond not just individually but collectively.

1980s Flashback: AIDS, ACT UP and Nancy

mijita

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Friday March 11, 2016 · 10:03 PM PST

2016/03/11 · 22:03

I confess that prior to today I hadn’t thought much about the 1980s in a while, except for vainly hoping that Prince would play in Los Angeles. I’m from Los Angeles, born and bred, third or fourth generation depending how you count. I went to a west LA high school in from 1980- 1985, saw Oingo Boingo play at Loyola High. Heard Bruce Springsteen play “Born in the US” concerts, snuck in to see Tom Petty at the Whiskey. Remember REM playing the mound at UCLA.

But when I think of the 1980s, when I remember being a teenager, what I remember most is death. Horrible, horrible deaths. Young and middle aged men dying. Family, family friends, neighbors, my parents’ classmates, wasting away while their families and friends could do nothing but try and ease them, nurse them and mourn. It felt like death was everywhere. At first people were whispering about it. Talking about “cancer.” Whispers about sex and drugs. The shame of mourning. The shame of people knowing.

Hospital privileges denied to partners. Smug comments about sin.

Crude jokes.

No one could do anything. No one could say anything.

The silence from the establishment, the President was stifling.

It was such a relief when the activists in pink started appearing, started disrupting, started shouting. Literally screaming WE’RE DYING OVER HERE.

By the time someone heard them, did anything officially, years had passed. I’d gone through high school. I wasn’t a teenager anymore. I’d learned to be afraid whenever a man dropped weight fast. By then, the Reagans were finally leaving office and found “innocent” AIDS victim Ryan White and were able to talk publicly about HIV / AIDS.

I spent today remembering.

Forced Births in the Bad Old Days

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Wednesday February 22, 2012 · 4:42 PM PST

2012/02/22 · 16:42

I'm much more of a commenter than a blogger on Kos, but the issues surrounding women's health, birth control and abortion have been on my mind a lot lately. I've refrained from writing a diary because I didn't feel I had anything to say that someone else hadn't already said better and more forcefully. However, I've realized over the past few weeks that the history of women's lives before and after legal birth control and abortion is worth recounting.

When I was in college, I was part of a group of women who maintained access at women's clinics when anti-abortion protesters were trying to block women seeking abortion, contraception and, ironically, pre-natal care, from the clinics. We would go to any of the Los Angeles area clinics where we heard the anti-abortion protestors were. We were different ages and from different parts of the city, but standing outside, putting our bodies between the protestors and the women patients,we got to know each other very well. Judy's story has always haunted me. With her permission, I'll recount it.

Judy was born in 1950 to an east coast Irish Catholic family. Her father worked outside the home. Her mother, with six children, kept house and raised the children. Her extended family was huge. When she was 12, her mother's brother, 10 years older than Judy, began to molest her.

Like a lot of girls of that time, Judy didn't really understand what sex was, let alone what was happening to her. She liked the attention but also felt very ashamed and had no way of talking to her mother about what was going on. At 13 she started getting sick, not just in the mornings, but all day long. Her mother took her to the doctor who examined her and realized that Judy, who had not yet actually gotten her first period yet, was pregnant.

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Friday March 26, 2010 · 12:41 PM PDT

2010/03/26 · 12:41

[I was asked to post this here. I would love to see someone from the dKos community get some of this funding.]

ATTENTION STUDENT ACTIVISTS!

The Davis-Putter Scholarship Fund has applications available for student activists who are building the progressive movement and will be enrolled in school during the 2010-11 academic year. Our website provides answers to questions about the Fund, the application process, and the students we support. If you know of students working for peace and justice, or if you have a list of activist contacts, please send this announcement along and refer potential applicants to the Fund’s website.

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Tuesday November 04, 2008 · 8:01 PM PST

2008/11/04 · 20:01

My grandfather, who died two years ago at 101, used to play and sing this song with every Democratic victory and he'd dance with his wife (who died a year ago October). Everything I know about party and union loyalty I learned from them.

I've poured out a glass of 15 year old scotch and am going to sing it out for him. Buddy would have loved to be here tonight.

Mom Says: We All Give Our Clothes to Charity

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Wednesday October 22, 2008 · 3:38 PM PDT

2008/10/22 · 15:38

My mom and I have been watching the news of Sarah Palin's spending sprees with a combination of outrage, horror and serious amusement these past couple days.

My mother is especially horrified at the amount of GOP money spent by Sarah Palin, reminding me that even Barbara Bush got all her clothing off the rack from Talbot's (though clearly she could have afforded to shop anywhere).

But the tipping point that made Mom ask me to post something on Kos was hearing the Republican spin that the Palin expense is somehow justified because the campaign intends to donate the clothes to charity after Sarah Palin's done wearing them.

As Mom says:

Nobody just tosses clothes in the trash when they're done with them -- we all donate our clothes to charity.

As ever, the Republican excuses are insulting and meaningless. Still, I guess it's nice of the GOP to give SNL and Tina Fey this week's material.

UCI & Riverside Mourn Loss of Prof. Lindon Barrett

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Tuesday July 15, 2008 · 1:57 PM PDT

2008/07/15 · 13:57

I was shocked this afternoon to get the news of the apparent murder of English and African American Studies professor, Lindon Barrett. He was apparently murdered this past week in his Long Beach, CA apartment.

Barrett was a wonderful scholar, teaching English, African American literature and Comparative literature at both UC Irvine and Riverside. He's the author of the book Blackness and Value: Seeing Double and a Ford Fellow.

But more importantly he was a wonderful man and mentor. He will be greatly missed. To all his students, current and former, and to his family I offer my deepest sympathy.

For more details on Professor Barrett, see this blog entry.

A Podcast Addiction Edition

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Wednesday June 04, 2008 · 2:48 PM PDT

2008/06/04 · 14:48

[Forgive me for bursting into our nominee diary-fest (yes, I am pleased it's Obama and thrilled it's over and I get to focus on how we take down McCain), but I figure this is the best place to get ideas from like-minded souls.]

Even though I live in Santa Monica and work in Los Angeles, I don't drive. Instead I spend a total of 3-4 hours commuting on foot and bus 2 -3 days a week. I used to read, but lately find I really like listening to podcasts. It's probably no surprise to readers here that my favorites are of a political stripe.

Below are a list of my current favorites and a request that you add your own favorites. I'm always looking for something new to listen to.

As I listen in the morning, please no shouting and no conservatives. ::G::

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Thursday February 14, 2008 · 1:19 PM PST

2008/02/14 · 13:19

It's been kind of funny to watch. My father, smug now because he's supported Obama since last May (he'd read both books already), has gotten to see us all move over from our respective candidates.

My mom was the last convert. (Okay, partly that was that her original candidate, Hillary, stayed in the race) -- deciding to change her support Obama only after listening to Bill campaigning in SC. But Mom's fond of Hillary on a lot of levels, even as Obama is reminding her more and more of her own experiences campaigning for RFK back in 1968.

So why do I say she's now in the hearts category? Because I just got an email with this. A second look shows it's gone out to all her friends and family.

Yeah. Momma's spammin' for Obama.

Poll

47 votes Show Results

What's the best Valentine?

47 votes Vote Now!

What's the best Valentine?

Chocolates

5 votes

Flowers

3 votes

Handmade card

6 votes

Romantic dinner

8 votes

Cherry pie

4 votes

Screw it, I want all of the above!

21 votes

Gang Rape & Breast Implants: Asking For It? (Not!)

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Thursday December 13, 2007 · 9:33 PM PST

2007/12/13 · 21:33

The story of 22 year old Jamie Leigh Jones, front paged on Tuesday by Miss Laura continues to (very slowly) build and get air time.

Yesterday Keith Olbermann spoke about the rape and the apparent lack of any sort of investigation on Countdown, rightly broadening the discussion into one about the lawlessness of US contractors.

There appears to be cross-party support for hearings into this matter with both Republican Congressman Poe and Democrats (including Hilary Clinton) calling on the Justice Department to update them on the status of this case. Another woman has apparently contacted Democratic Senator Bill Nelson about her sexual assault while she was a KBR employee. Congress has asked the JD to respond by next Friday.

However, the right is already spinning this case.

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Friday November 09, 2007 · 12:42 PM PST

2007/11/09 · 12:42

There's a world-weary tendency among those of us who are active in politics to look at certain fights and decide that "it doesn't matter." The reasons can be that realistically the fight can't be won, that there are other more worthy issues, that we're saving energy / goodwill for another time or whatever. This creeping cynicism comes from the often necessary compromises of politics. But we're wrong when we say a fight (whether fought or not) doesn't matter. Especially if our reasoning is that it would be a losing battle anyway.

The obvious example today is the confirmation of (now) Attorney General Michael Mukasey by the US Senate despite his (in Schumer words) being "wrong on torture." As we look at the facts: he was passed on through Senate hearings, no one opposed to his confirmation attempted a filibuster, our presidential candidates didn't show up for the vote. As we listen, stunned and disgusted, there are voices trying to explain, to tell us that "it doesn't matter because...."

Sometimes the fight can't be fought. Other times the fight can't be won and discretion is the better part of valor and all t hat. At times though a fight has to be worth losing but fighting all the same.

mijita

Community (This content is not subject to review by Daily Kos staff prior to publication.)

Thursday March 03, 2005 · 2:15 AM PST

2005/03/03 · 02:15

Yesterday my partner and I planned to go see the film Shi mian mai fu (House of Flying Daggers), a nicely surrealistic martial arts film I've been wanting to see. But as these things go we got stuck in traffic on Sunset and arrived 10 minutes after the film had already started. As an alternate choice, Paul surprised me and asked if I still wanted to see Hotel Rwanda, a film I've wanted to see for several months, but that I thought I'd see alone as it isn't really his sort of picture.
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On Leaving Facebook

1980s Flashback: AIDS, ACT UP and Nancy

Forced Births in the Bad Old Days

Funding Opportunity: Davis-Putter Scholarship for Student Activists

Happy Days Are Here Again

Mom Says: We All Give Our Clothes to Charity

UCI & Riverside Mourn Loss of Prof. Lindon Barrett

A Podcast Addiction Edition

My Mom's Obama Valentine.

Gang Rape & Breast Implants: Asking For It? (Not!)

Yes, It Matters

Who would you call?