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View Diary: Nothing's Shocking, Except Child Sexual Abuse (32 comments)

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  •  I can't imagine not stopping the rape. (3+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    congenitalefty, Matt Z, Jbeaudill

    That's my first, primary judgment against McQueary, the grad student, and I judge him harshly for that.

    If McQueary was never interviewed by police about what he'd seen, then he should have followed up to ensure a report was filed.

    Daughter and I just talked about this and agreed about stopping the rape, no matter if the rapist is boss, father, son, brother, spouse. The only valid reason for not immediately stopping the rape would be the likelihood of great, immediate personal danger -- a gang rape, for example, or the rapist having a dangerous weapon.

    I'm a 5'3" female who would most certainly have done something to stop that rape.

    The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little. -FDR

    by SoCalSal on Thu Nov 10, 2011 at 09:47:08 AM PST

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    •  Don't be so sure (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      SoCalSal

      until you find yourself in that situation. We humans are not as good at making the right decision "in the moment" as we like to think we are.

      He should have called the police. He absolutely should have called the police. I'm willing to give him a pass on calling his dad first, on reporting it to the AD the next morning, on trusting the administration to handle it. But as the weeks went on and he got the feeling that people weren't taking him seriously and nothing was being done and Sandusky still had access to kids, he should have called the cops. That dereliction is inexcusable.

      But as for what he did "in the moment" - look, I'd like to think that my automatic reaction would have been to run up, rip the guy off the kid, and punch his face in. But I know that that reaction is only one side of the 50/50 fight-or-flight coinflip. There's an equally good chance I would have frozen, had a flashback, panicked, run away, and called my dad. Neither of those is a sign of a bad person or someone who doesn't care.

      "Let’s just move on, treat everybody with firmness, fairness, dignity, compassion and respect. Let’s be Marines." - Sgt. Maj Michael Barrett on DADT repeal

      by kyril on Thu Nov 10, 2011 at 01:51:21 PM PST

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      •  Self knowledge (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        kyril

        I'm the one who acts in a crisis. Now I'm a gray-haired granny who moves slowly... but I'd still act. It's what I do. Way back in my thirties a man tried to break into my house about 11 pm. I hollered, rushed the door and chased him half a block before realizing that wasn't the wisest move. But it worked, he didn't get past taking a window apart and he never came back. Before that, I was the one who saved a child's life. Twice. Others froze, not me. I'm one of those who stops to help in a traffic accident.

        In recent months I stopped a physical altercation between two young men, just me and my dishtowel, and stopped a neighbor from beating up his girlfriend by yelling and pounding on the door until he let her go and she opened the door so I could grab her and get her out of there. Broke a bone in my hand.

        On the other hand, I can be struck dumb by intense conversations and only think of the best thing to say when it's too late. So I understand the freeze, in a way.

        The test of our progress is not whether we add more to the abundance of those who have much; it is whether we provide enough for those who have too little. -FDR

        by SoCalSal on Thu Nov 10, 2011 at 03:45:23 PM PST

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