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View Diary: My 98yo mom kicks my butt (81 comments)

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  •  cany, I've had a request to (4+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    Ebby, Lujane, cany, ms badger

    put you on the community quilt list.  Would you like a quilt with messages of support from the kind people here?

    I agree with the many upthread who have suggested hospice.  My parents both had hospice in the home in their last illnesses -- and it was a godsend to the whole family.  Hospice will support you.  It's a whole team of people -- doctors and nurses, certainly, but also counselors, social workers, and a Chaplain if you need one.  For us, the counselors followed with us for a year after my mother's death and it was very helpful.  

    The Community Quilt Project now has a website! And so do the Pootie Pads -- everypootie needs a Pootie Pad!

    by Sara R on Sat Dec 17, 2011 at 04:26:55 PM PST

    •  Let me expound a little bit... (4+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Ebby, Lujane, cany, AllisonInSeattle

      Hospice workers have seen so much -- with a hospice team, you get a real depth of experience.  I remember feeling so out of my depth, never having had to face a mortal illness before my father's -- and then only 8 months after he was gone, my mother's.  It's a really lonely, helpless feeling.  In such a situation, a team of people who know what you are going through is a real comfort and support.  

      The Community Quilt Project now has a website! And so do the Pootie Pads -- everypootie needs a Pootie Pad!

      by Sara R on Sat Dec 17, 2011 at 05:11:37 PM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  Gosh, the quilt is such a wonderful thought. I (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Ebby

        would love to have one, Sarah. It is so kind of you.

        I am going to call the doctor tomorrow and see what he thinks about hospice. I don't think I could ever put her through that again.

        This is one of those times I truly need help as I have no clue what I am doing. The thought of making a decision about my mom living/dying is almost incomprehensible to me. So I do know I need guidance here.

        I have kept most of my friends--actually all my friends, pretty much--out of this. It is too mind bending and I feel too erratic which makes me feel more alone than it probably should.

        I so appreciate everyone offering their support and kindness. It means so much to me.

        202-224-3121 to Congress in D.C. USE it! You can tell how big a person is by what it takes to discourage them.

        by cany on Sun Dec 18, 2011 at 09:31:58 AM PST

        [ Parent ]

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