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View Diary: Stop the War on Mothers (85 comments)

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  •  I had to go back to work when my son was 3 wks old (31+ / 0-)

    I had been working at the same job for five years.  I was a cook in a restaurant.  Throughout my pregnancy, the owner tried tirelessly to get me to quit, forcing me to haul 50 cases of potatoes up the three flights of stairs from the prep area where they were stored so he could "inspect" them, forcing me to work 12 hour shifts, restricting bathroom breaks, and in general making my life hell.  
    When my son was 3 weeks old he had the general manager call me and tell me they needed me to come back to work the next day or not at all.  Though it broke my heart, I agreed to go back to work.
    When I did, I was only given 8 hours a week, being told that since I couldn't work weekends (no daycares are open on weekends in the rural Alabama town I'm from) that's all the hours they had for me.
    I had never taken a break, missed a day, or called in sick (even if I was).  I always came in when called.  
    I was forced to express breast milk in a public bathroom- often sent for after 15 or 20 minutes to come back to work.  Not that it mattered, because I discovered just after my son's first birthday that the daycare he was in was microwaving his breast milk, despite my specifically asking and being told they wouldn't do that-- I even offered to buy a bottle warmer they could keep to try to prevent it.
    I was orphaned at a very young age.  Moved out on my own at the age of 14 and have worked a full time job since.   I have lost many of those jobs leaving work to pick up and/or care for my child when he was sick.
    I have to admit, I do know women who had child after child just to live large off the government.  They let their children run amok- that is, if they don't pass them off to their parents or some other relative.  So, make no mistake, they're out there.  
    But, for those of us who are sincerely trying to juggle the struggle of being a good employee vs. being a good mom, kudos to you.  YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB.  HANG IN THERE.
    I myself found the whole ordeal so difficult, I chose not to have any more children.  It seemed to cruel to the child.

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