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View Diary: I'm so angry, I'm crying; I'm so sad, I want to scream. (185 comments)

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  •  In grade skule, a christian washing of (17+ / 0-)

    brains place where penguins bearing metal rulers ruled the Dei, I had a classmate who was stupid, mean, and a head taller than I. He loved making me daze hell.

    Then, the last day in that school, before I transferred to a new suburban skule, he really tried to pick on me.
    As he swung his legs at me, using two desks as a support, he aimed closer and closer to my head. Finally, I lifted his legs so high that he fell down, hitting his head. The other students cheered.

    Stopping that shitheel made me happy, almost as happy when I learned decades later that he was in jail for spousal abuse.

    It taught me a lot. Standing up to a bully was important.

    6 yrs later, as a fresh in HS, the youngest of three brothers took a serious dislike to me. Every time, for a week, as I walked by, he would punch me in my stomach as hard as he could. If it complained. He threatened me with worse from his much larger brothers.

    Finally I had enough.

    The next time he tried, from somewhere deep in my animal midbrain, I found the energy to pick him up, and throw him about five feet into a wall of lockers. He hit about two feet off the ground, and crumpled down. Never bothered me again.

    At no time did I feel pride. Only relief.

    What we call god is merely a living creature with superior technology & understanding. If their fragile egos demand prayer, they lose that superiority.

    by agnostic on Sun Apr 15, 2012 at 07:00:46 PM PDT

    •  The culture of the bully (9+ / 0-)

      begins with the adults.  I was 65 lbs, bucked toothed, quiet and odd in middle school.  I got made fun of all the time.  Mild bullying compared to what I read in these diaries but I felt humiliated every day of my life.  I had talents and while the teachers may have marveled at my work, I received no encouragement.  That makes me the most angry.  Anyway, I had a science teacher who probably taught bullying class on the side.  He was an awful, sarcastic, caustic prick and treated most of us with burning contempt. When he called on people he used last names often proudly mispronounced.  He called on me one day using a completely wrong pronounciation.  All 65 lbs of me hunkered down in my chair and I sat silent with my head down.  He called louder and more urgently, ready to excoriate me with vitriol while the class got ready to howl at his antics with me.  I looked up and replied that when he said my name properly I would answer him.  The class gasped.  He got beet red and asked sarcastically the proper annunciation.  I replied and he asked me the question saying my name properly.  Things got a bit better after that but I continued on to an all girl high school the next year and never looked back.  That one act was a turning point in my life and I gained confidence that built up in the next years.  

      And she's good at appearing sane, I just want you to know. Winwood/Capaldi

      by tobendaro on Mon Apr 16, 2012 at 06:00:58 AM PDT

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      •  I think parents have a lot to answer for (5+ / 0-)

        in most cases of bullying.

        The jerk who was doing the punching was a case in point. There was some HS event in which all parents were supposed to attend. Mine came, as did his. Both his father and he (I don't recall where the brothers were) berated, harassed and swore at the mother. They treated her like dirt.

        I had never experienced any thing like that before, and it turned mu stomach.

        What we call god is merely a living creature with superior technology & understanding. If their fragile egos demand prayer, they lose that superiority.

        by agnostic on Mon Apr 16, 2012 at 06:40:37 AM PDT

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    •  I remember standing up to a bully once... (1+ / 0-)
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      It was in high school, and this guy kept harassing me.  Finally, I had had enough and said, "Whatever you say, zitface" (he had a pretty bad complexion).  His friend started laughing and the guy turned beet red with anger.  I thought I was done for.  He grabbed my shirt, threw me up against the wall and asked me if I wanted to die.  I was like, "No?".  Anyways, he let me go.

      The next day, everything changed.  He actually was nice to me and treated me with some respect.  We actually became pretty decent friends, believe it or not.  I always had a hard time believing it, but after awhile, I realized that it was genuine.  It was a textbook example of standing up to a bully success story.  Of course, YMMV.  There are plenty of stories about standing up to a bully and still getting one's ass kicked as a result.


      by LordMike on Mon Apr 16, 2012 at 05:08:42 PM PDT

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