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View Diary: Tonight I finally got the chance to apologize to the cashier I F-Bombed (125 comments)

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  •  You should have apologized instead of blaming her (7+ / 0-)

    for what you did.

    Your vote is your consent.

    by JesseCW on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 07:43:30 PM PDT

    •  Nah (5+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      JesseCW, DuzT, raster44, ratmach, weck

      Blaming others for our own shortcomings, choosing to confront instead of engage, GOTV don't ya know.

      There are no sacred cows.

      by LaEscapee on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 07:58:53 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  are you reading the same diary I am? (25+ / 0-)

      Because on my computer, DuzT totally apologized, twice. He didn't blame her, he offered an explanation of what in her behavior set him off and then again apologized.

      What are you looking for?

      If you've had communication instruction, you are taught to say, "when you did this, I felt (or I thought)  X, and then I did Y," rather than say you made me do this.  DuzT did it exactly right in the diary I'm reading.

      •  Are you reading what was actually written? (8+ / 0-)

        A real apology stops

        "I shouldn't have sworn at you, I'm sorry.  And threatening your job, I'm sorry about that too."

        right there.

        "It's just that, it's just that I had had a bad day and you were saying things that I know aren't true about the president and I lost my temper and I'm sorry."

        That is making excuses and blaming the damned victim.

        You don't go creating a hostile work environment for someone, then go back and re-offend, and get pats on the back for it from me.

        You may see things differently.  I don't see an apology, I see an attempted justification and more mistreatment.

        Your vote is your consent.

        by JesseCW on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:04:35 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Yeah but wait Jesse (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          ratmach, weck

          She doesn't like the preznit she must deserve every nasty insult she gets. Even the backanded apologies.

          There are no sacred cows.

          by LaEscapee on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:13:06 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  It doesn't matter (12+ / 0-)

            If she was slamming the President or praising him to the skies. She was at work, doing customer service, and when you're in that kind of job, you're supposed to leave that sort of thing at HOME.

            You don't talk religion, politics, or any other subject that might offend the customer.

            I've worked in customer service, both as a service worker and as a manager.

            If I (or anyone working for me, for that matter) had been talking loudly about politics left, right or center (or religion) while at work, we likely would have been fired. And when I was manager, if anyone who worked for me had done that and upset a customer, they would have gotten at the minimum a good talking to.

            Rule #1 of customer service - read what the title is. CUSTOMER SERVICE.

            That means making them happy, so that they want to come back.

            "We have only the moral ground we actually inhabit, not the moral ground we claim." - It Really Is That Important

            by Diogenes2008 on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 10:56:40 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

            •  Right.... Limbaugh, Faux News "doesn't matter"??? (0+ / 0-)

              It is up to each of us to STAND UP AGAINST HATE & deliberate dis-info.

              Congratulations on standing up and trying your best to apologize to someone who might just possibly "get it"... as what they SEE happening is not what they HEAR on hate filled corporate channels...

              Keep it up! Our World will be a much better place if we can all learn to discuss things w/o HATE.  The TBTF want the HATE so they can keep stealing all our money and power...

              "Hatred paralyzes life; love releases it.
              Hatred confuses life; love harmonizes it.
              Hatred darkens life; love illuminates it."
                                - -- Martin Luther King Jr.
              •  Did you even bother to read the rest (0+ / 0-)

                of my comment??

                My point was that SHE WAS NOT SUPPOSED TO TALK POLITICS AT WORK.

                Nobody in any real customer service job is supposed to do that, regardless of their political beliefs.

                Good grief.

                "We have only the moral ground we actually inhabit, not the moral ground we claim." - It Really Is That Important

                by Diogenes2008 on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 11:52:11 AM PDT

                [ Parent ]

                •  Good grief indeed friend. Seriously, engaging in (0+ / 0-)

                  small semantics while the bigger picture continues to take ALL DOWN, including YOU.

                  Consider RESPECTING the apology, no matter how, where or when given.

                  Time to work together - not play word games, eh?

                  In Buddhist terms, the great universe and the self—the great macrocosm and the microcosm—are one. Since the self and all phenomena are one, all things are interrelated. Termed dependent origination, this teaching explains that all things weave a single whole in which individuals live in relation to all others.

                  In other words, all beings and phenomena exist or occur because of their relationship with other beings and phenomena, and nothing in either the human or the nonhuman world exists in isolation. All things are mutually related to and interdependent with all other things. They all form a great cosmos maintaining the rhythms of life. http://www.sgi-usa.org/...

      •  Bullshit (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        DuzT, weck

        Did you read the diary where he/she called out an older woman because he/she was tired? Not that a woman working in the evening might have been but because she was complaining will they were headed home and were discomforted by having to stand in line and listen to someone complain.

        And then this?

        Yeah OK

        There are no sacred cows.

        by LaEscapee on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:09:30 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  ridiculous. you don't get to pop off about (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          JoanMar, Diogenes2008

          politics when you're in a customer service position.

          period, end of story.
          I'd say the exact same thing if the POV's of the diarist and the cashier were reversed.  meaning, if the diarist was completely disillusioned with the president and the cashier was singing his praises, loudly because this isn't about politics, it's about workplace behavior, and how the customer is always right.

          This comment is dedicated to my mellow Adept2U and his Uncle Marcus

          by mallyroyal on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 09:57:48 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  Agreed (0+ / 0-)

            How do people not understand this? It has nothing to do with politics, really - it has to do with how you behave in the workplace.

            "We have only the moral ground we actually inhabit, not the moral ground we claim." - It Really Is That Important

            by Diogenes2008 on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 01:13:53 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

      •  How do you edit this out? (5+ / 0-)
        "I mean this isn't the place for, um, for that.  You know?"
        How do you pretend that's not blame?

        How could anyone seriously treat some random cashier the way that DuzT treat this woman and then

        I also imagined her apologizing back, explaining that she never should have spoken to a customer that way.
        have that fantasy?

        This is wasn't an apology - it was the behavior of someone who still thinks this was at worst some kind of 50-50 altercation.

        Someone who doesn't realize they victimized a defenseless person in their place of employment, and used them as a verbal punching bag to vent all their impotent rage over a politician being criticized.

        Your vote is your consent.

        by JesseCW on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:11:33 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  The original encounter... (16+ / 0-)

          ..involved me standing in a checkout line listening to a cashier loudly spouting RW talking points about the president not understanding what "regular people" go through and how he probably never had to actually shop for groceries in his life because everything has been handed to him.  When I, politely, asked her to stop, she went on.  That's when I cursed at her.  So, yeah, I would say 50-50 is actually pretty accurate.

          I can see Canada from my house. No, really, I can.

          by DuzT on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:26:46 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  In that case -- that you still perceive that (5+ / 0-)

            as 50-50 -- you weren't ready to make a sincere apology.

            The sh*t those people [republicans] say just makes me weep for humanity! - Woody Harrelson

            by SoCalSal on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:59:01 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

            •  We liberals are so ready to tear into each other. (23+ / 0-)

              Are you implying the lady was completely blameless?  That I should have just kept quiet and listened to her bullshit?
              I did, sincerely, mean my apology for getting vulgar with her, not for standing up to her.  I will never apologize for that.

              I can see Canada from my house. No, really, I can.

              by DuzT on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 09:08:10 PM PDT

              [ Parent ]

              •  We are now judging (27+ / 0-)

                the quality/sincerity/verbs used in fucking apologies?
                You spoke off the cuff, from the heart, and you are not a politician, and your apology as you gave it was authentic, and that is good enough for me and mine.

                •  DITTO. More please from all of us... spread LOVE (1+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  on the cusp

                  and understanding that folks are just not informed or able to think critically when they are living paycheck to paycheck...

                  •    "A human being is part of the whole, called by us 'universe,' limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest – a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness.

                  This delusion is a prison, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons close to us.  

                  Our task must be to free ourselves from our prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all humanity and the whole of nature in its beauty."
                               – Albert Einstein

              •  Then apologize for what you are sincere about (3+ / 0-)
                Recommended by:
                Uncle Moji, weck, AaronInSanDiego

                and leave the rest out of it, instead of re-stating your judgment about her political views.

                You indicated that you were unsure of her reaction to your apology. My intention is to give you feedback on that, not to "tear into you". A non-apology can be worse than no apology at all.

                The sh*t those people [republicans] say just makes me weep for humanity! - Woody Harrelson

                by SoCalSal on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 09:24:18 PM PDT

                [ Parent ]

                •  It is not a non-apology apology, (9+ / 0-)

                  he apologized for the form, not the reason. Making that clear is not a non-apology apology as those that go like "sorry if I offended anyone". That he apologized, and did so with no ifs, is proof enough for me that he is contrite. Explaining the is apology is helpful and makes it clear what is that he is apologizing for. It is always much preferable to be respectful in the first place, that is what I teach my kids. But there are also people that wont stop until you talk to them in the same tone and maner they use, and that is what it takes sometimes to show them where the line is. The real trick is knowing when it is really worth going there and in my opinion it is not worth it most of the time. Obviously DuzT knows he crossed a line or two himself and for that he did apologize and he did so as a consequence of what he was told in the original diary. That tells me that he thought about it and now he told us that he acted on it.

              •  What you did to her was NOT liberal! (1+ / 0-)
                Recommended by:
                singlemom2012

                It was something I'd expect the worst of the Busheep to do when they heard someone like me -- no someone like my 85 year-old Mom -- say something against George W. Bush. That's what I would have expected from some rightwinger... NOT from a "liberal". Oh, and by the way, she was not totally wrong about Obama. He might not have always been an elitist, but he most definitely is NOW.  So tell me what you think of ME now.

                "Any dictator would admire the uniformity and obedience of the U.S. media." -- Noam Chomsky

                by ratmach on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 11:56:35 PM PDT

                [ Parent ]

              •  You are a good person...you did the right thing. (7+ / 0-)

                What the hell is with all this piling on people????

                Ignorance is the curse of God; knowledge is the wing wherewith we fly to heaven. William Shakespeare

                by lutznancy on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 04:02:04 AM PDT

                [ Parent ]

                •  Unfortunately (4+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  Russgirl, JoanMar, DuzT, Naniboujou

                  They're reacting based on how they feel about what she said, evidently.

                  What she said DOES NOT MATTER HERE. It's where she said it that counts.

                  She was wrong to be spouting opinions on a customer service job, PERIOD.

                  When you work with the public, you have to learn to set those things aside until you're off work. I've been there and done that.

                  Hell, I was making change for a customer once, and chatting with them (small talk) and tried to break a roll of quarters on the counter.

                  I missed. Just a tiny bit. Got my finger partly under the roll when I cracked it, and it hurt like hell. Instant blood blister.

                  Do you know how I reacted? I kept smiling, kept chatting, and tried again with the roll of quarters.

                  It was such a habit with me not to "break face" that I don't think the customers had any clue what had happened.

                  After they walked away (and the area was clear) THEN I said "Ouch!" (Albeit quietly.)

                  People need to stop making this into something it isn't. It isn't about WHAT she said specifically.

                  It's customer service, and the point of it is to bring customers IN, not chase them away. People can shop anywhere they please. They do not have to shop at your establishment, which is why you make sure your employees do not piss them off by doing stupid stuff like blathering on about religion or politics of ANY KIND while in public view.

                  1. The woman was in the wrong.

                  2. She could have easily lost her job over this.

                  3. Diarist did not go to the manager, so she kept her job.

                  4. He apologized. He didn't have to - she was in the wrong in the first place. I think it's good that he did, but even so, she was in the wrong here, and could have lost her job over this. She needed to realize that, and so do we.

                  5. How many times did she spout off like that before he came along? How many customers went elsewhere so as not to have to put up with her? How much money did the store lose? If they lost enough money, someone ELSE could have lost their job, not just her.

                  Diarist did her and the store a favor. Perhaps he was a bit harsh, but he's HUMAN. You can't, any of you, tell me you always handle situations perfectly every time. You tell me that and I'll laugh my ass off.

                  Nobody gets it right every time - ever. But as I said, he did her a favor by reminding her that what she was doing was bad for her job, and bad for the company. She kept her job. He apologized for not being a saint.

                  Can we leave OUR politics out of this for a moment, and just look at the reality of it??

                  "We have only the moral ground we actually inhabit, not the moral ground we claim." - It Really Is That Important

                  by Diogenes2008 on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 08:19:50 AM PDT

                  [ Parent ]

          •  Yeah, and I remember the FEAR in her eyes (2+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            gooderservice, weck

            And how she looked meekly at the floor and quietly said, "I'm sorry sir." Yeah I remember that. And seriously, I still cannot believe you got out of that store without someone getting right in your face.

            "Any dictator would admire the uniformity and obedience of the U.S. media." -- Noam Chomsky

            by ratmach on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 11:52:02 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

          •  I think you shouldn't have bothered apologizing (1+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            weck

            Obviously, it didn't make a big impact if she didn't even remember you.  People saying how it was so terrible are therefore blowing it out of proportion.  

            You shouldn't have cursed at her, but if she was even partially responsible for what happened then no apology was necessary.  And as it turned out it sounds like you mostly just made a fool of yourself by doing so, and managed to bring up a trivial disagreement that would have been best left to lie.  

            Some people around here are just overly sensitive and you'd be best off ignoring their advice.  

          •  One, you never wrote that you asked her to stop. (0+ / 0-)

            You waited until you paid for your groceries and they were all packed up before you talked to her and let her have it.

            And two, you already got your apology.

            I also imagined her apologizing back, explaining that she never should have spoken to a customer that way.
            -------------------------------------
            The cashier was an older white woman and she looked like she'd had a hard life.  I often feel bad when I see older people still working when, in a just society, they shouldn't have to. Obviously I don't know her story but there she was checking and bagging groceries, a job which keeps you on your feet for hours on end, at 8:30 on a Friday night.

            She started making small talk with the lady in line before me and out of the blue said,
            "Of course Obama says there's no inflation.  I don't think the man has ever had to buy groceries in his life.  He probably gets his employees to do it for him.  You know, buy his arugula?"

            The lady in line made some sound of agreement which didn't come across as heartfelt to me.  Maybe she agreed but didn't want to get into it, maybe she didn't agree but didn't want to get into it.  Most likely she barely heard what the cashier was saying and just wanted to get home.  I don't know.  She paid and split.
            So the woman begins checking out my groceries (including the arugula) and starts in with me about "that man, that elitist" in the white house having "no idea" what it's like for regular people out here.  On and on.

            My anger was building up to a boil; I mean, I just wanted to get home to that beer and who knows how many people before me had to hear this crap?  
            So after I was all paid up and everything was in my cart I said to her,

            "I suggest you keep your political opinions to yourself when you're standing there because you never know who's standing here.  I don't appreciate hearing my president trashed like that.  That's all I'm going to say."
            Her eyes flashed with anger and realization that I must be one of "those people".  

            She drew in a breath, about to say something and I said,
            "If you say one more fucking thing I'll go find your manager and all three of us can discuss this."
            At that, she suddenly deflated.  Now the look in her eyes was fear. She looked down and meekly mumbled "Ok.  Sorry sir."
            I left then, proud of myself and still full of anger.

            After the first encounter with you, I don't blame her for not wanting to speak to you.

            We delivered. They failed us. We have moved on. (h/t to my good friend)

            by gooderservice on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 07:29:25 AM PDT

            [ Parent ]

          •  Don't worry, DuzT. The above criticism is not (4+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            Diogenes2008, Russgirl, slouchsock, DuzT

            about you or your encounter with cashier.
            They are not even reading what you wrote and have zero concern with what really happened.
            This is prepackaged, stale rage finding another outlet.

            You did the right thing both times.
            It says a lot about who you are that you should seek out the cashier and seek to correct a perceived wrong.
            Thank you.

          •  I've been in your shoes before... (0+ / 0-)

            Getting mad at a cashier in a grocery store, that is. I felt foolish, and wished I hadn't said anything, even though I felt the store employees had some blame.

            One store I go to is not unionized, and when my s.o. applied for a job there, they made her make all sorts of statements disavowing unionization, making her painfully aware that if she tried to get unions involved, she would be in big trouble there.

            I got into an argument with a cashier about unionization. "I'm making more at this non-union store than I did at the unionized store. I don't like unions," she intoned.  The people waiting in line stared at her, and at me. Yeah, at that time in my financially precarious life these were fighting words. I took it very personally. I'd been going to Occupy meetings and events, and was riled up and mad at the fucking capitalist world and was in no mood for bullshit.

            I hate the store, but it is convenient to go to. The employees often seem to be conservative, unhappy, unfeeling. And therefore I can easily understand and empathize with how your conversation with her could have occurred.

            But one thing really crosses the line. Don't threaten, ever, the job of a working person. Jobs are precious; a lifeline to one's basic survival needs. The fear of losing a job is the fear of losing everything. It is the fear of one's children not having food to eat, a house to live in, clothes to wear. Getting mad and speaking up about politics may have been okay, and I have done this, but to threaten her job is not.

            I get irritated about how conservatives feel so free to spout their ignorance in almost any venue, as if they think they're so righteous that they have a privilege the rest of us lack.

            But never threaten a job. Never. Not over politics. To callously or casually threaten a person's job is classist, in my view. I would only do that to management, if at all. People who know poverty know you don't threaten another person's low paying  job. Basic stuff. People who are financially comfortable have no idea what it means to lose a low paying job where you're just barely hanging on. To threaten her job over that probably made you look like an affluent, elite member of a higher social class, and just made her more convinced you're some clueless liberal. You weren't helping to threaten her job, and you weren't helping to go back and mix and apology with more blame. Not to pile on, mistakes are made, I get that, and I've been there too many times.

            But criticizing Obama is not justification for losing a job.

            And I agree here with some, you should not have brought up the blame all over again. In fact, it would have been better, in my view, to just have let the whole thing go. I say this from experience of being an irate person on occasion. When you step in it in such circumstances, the best thing is often to learn from it, but let it go. The employee just wants to get through her day, not deal with the stress of your apology/blame/need for exculpation.  As you observed they are tired. And very stressed. Overworked. Hanging on to their lives the best they can. All of these factors outweigh by far her personal politics and her small error of voicing her opinions in her workplace.

            Everywhere you will find that the wealth of the wealthy springs from the poverty of the poor. - from The Conquest of Bread by Peter Kropotkin

            by ZhenRen on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 11:37:27 AM PDT

            [ Parent ]

        •  Sorry but (10+ / 0-)
          "I mean this isn't the place for, um, for that.  You know?"
          Doesn't lay blame on just one person. That can also be read as a mea culpa. DuzT did the best he could and at least apologized for the original remarks. Some people are apparently perfect, though, and are determined to find him in the wrong. Sucks.

          You can fight without ever winning, but never ever win without a fight...

          by Purple Priestess on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 10:39:41 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

      •  Not in any communication training that I've had: (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Uncle Moji, gooderservice
        you are taught to say, "when you did this, I felt (or I thought)  X, and then I did Y," rather than say you made me do this.
        That statement is self description and places the same amount of blame as "you made me"; it does nothing to acknowledge the feelings of the person receiving the UNapology, or to acknowledge responsibility of the speaker.  Such a statement might work in a lengthy one-on-one reconciliation process, but doesn't make it as a true apology.

        The sh*t those people [republicans] say just makes me weep for humanity! - Woody Harrelson

        by SoCalSal on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:54:40 PM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  How about the communication training for any (7+ / 0-)

          customer service person that they, oh, don't mouth off with their personal political views while on the job dealing with customers?

          The clerk was 100% in the wrong and is lucky she wasn't fired in the first place for her egregiously inappropriate behavior.

          •  You are mixing apples and oranges (2+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            Murphoney, gooderservice

            That a clerk who is paid near or at minimum wage engages in inappropriate work behavior is an issue for her or his manager to take up.  And if there is an inappropriate or offensive event, the proper place to take it up is with management for failure to manage.  That is where the fault and blame and responsibility lies.  And each customer has that POWER to give that feedback to the manager or to the store corporate.  The result could be that the employee is fired and ends up unemployed, and perhaps unemployable. or the manager can ignore you and root on the employee.  or the manager can caution all employees not to discuss religion, politics, or sex on the job.

            Yelling at someone at their workplace or your workplace is compounding the egregious behavior.  If the customer was an employee and dropped the F-Bomb on a customer or another employee, I would be required to discipline BOTH of them.  Because the response to inappropriateness is never more inappropriateness.  

            The result here is that the employee was clearly sanctioned by her superior for her inappropriate behavior (it probably and properly is now part of her permanent personnel file and impacts her raise or future employment), but the customer suffered no tangible harm for his inappropriate behavior.  And, in my view, compounded it by seeking some balm from her for his "apology".  

            When you seek something back for an apology, whether it is understanding, or forgiveness, or recognition of what a wonderful person you are for manfully apologizing despite the fact that you (the receiver of the apology) cause it all, then, that's not really an apology.  

            Apologies come with no strings.  It is not meant to make the apologizer feel better.  It is atonement for doing wrong.  

            "Out of Many, One." This is the great promise of our nation -9.75 -6.87

            by Uncle Moji on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 05:49:20 AM PDT

            [ Parent ]

            •  Actually, apologies are exactly designed (3+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              slouchsock, DuzT, aitchdee

              to make the apologizer feel better.  If they didn't, no one would apologize.  Consider the clerk's own immediate apology for her foolish behavior: she didn't apologize with the ultimate goal of making the customer feel better, she did so to preserve her job, which was ultimately about making her feel better.

              So lambasting the diarist is unfair and, frankly, hypocritical.  He didn't even have to make an effort, but he did.  And there weren't any "strings" attached as you suggest, he was just expecting a bit more of an acknowledgement than he got.  I see nothing wrong with him feeling that way.  It's not like he berated her again for not acknowledging his apology.

              •  Nope, that may be true for you (0+ / 0-)

                that you would NEVER apologize unless it made you feel better, but for me, and for many others, your version of an apology is selfish and self-serving.  If that is the point of your version of an apology, then you would be rightly angry if you did not get the satisfaction from your victim that did not serve your selfish interest.  Cruel.  

                The string is clear in your own answer

                he was just expecting a bit more of an acknowledgement than he got
                that expectation is a string, and therefore the reason he got angry.  Selfishness is apparently not his alone, but yours as well.

                "Out of Many, One." This is the great promise of our nation -9.75 -6.87

                by Uncle Moji on Sun Apr 29, 2012 at 05:43:50 PM PDT

                [ Parent ]

                •  You apologize to make yourself feel better (0+ / 0-)

                  and you know it, and you're telling me a story if you claim you don't.

                  You feel guilty about something, so how do you make yourself feel guilty about it?  By doing something like apologizing to rectify it.  You want to make the other person feel better about it... which makes you feel better about it.  That's the ultimate point of even the most sincere apology.

                  There's nothing "cruel" about hoping your apology is acknowledged and received.  He didn't rescind the apology when it didn't go exactly as he had hoped, did he?  No.

                  Inflating his apology attempt into an atrocity is just plain ridiculous, so you can stop now.

        •  Feel free to spread non-hateful retoric which is (0+ / 0-)

          mindless passed on as rude, sick gossip by corporate owned newz for THEIR purposes... not to inform but to change public opinion.

          We all can do our part - EVERY DAY.
          Next time you are in public and stuck listening to hate, such as FAUX - ask whomever to TURN IT OFF.  Better yet - change the channel to Colbert or Stewart... anything but hateful propaganda.

          Spread the word - do your personal part to assist changing our world for the better?

          The GOP and the Right are about making people hurt in order to manipulate them on who to hate/who to blame for the reality they have created.
          •  I do that... (0+ / 0-)

            and attempt to do it without anger or using hateful language myself. I'm not always successful, but do keep trying.

            The sh*t those people [republicans] say just makes me weep for humanity! - Woody Harrelson

            by SoCalSal on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 01:48:25 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

      •  He sought her out (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        gooderservice

        For another confrontation.  From the description, she was terrified.  Obviously biting her tongue for fear of losing her McJob, which if you think about, is very sad.  

        What was the point of bringing it up again?  To me, it was to justify the diarists own behavior, which is what he or she did right after the so called apology.  

        If you haven't earned my vote when the time comes, don't blame me when you lose.

        by Nada Lemming on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 05:45:01 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

    •  You two are so fucking ridiculous. (9+ / 0-)

      How cool you guys must feel for ganging up on someone because they dare like the president.

      You both make me ill.

      If I wanted government in my uterus, I'd fuck a senator

      by second gen on Fri Apr 27, 2012 at 08:25:43 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  When someone cares more about defending... (4+ / 0-)

        .... some politician than they do about the feelings of a tired, worn-out, lower-class old lady, then it's hard to feel sympathy for that person. Fine, do I really need to show what a real apology would look like? After introducing myself and reminding her about that night (as if she needs reminding):

        "Ma'am, I'm really sorry for what I did. It's true I like Barack Obama and you don't, but that gave me NO right to do what I did. And I really hope that that didn't cause you any pain beyond our short encounter. If it did, if you've been thinking about it since then, then I feel even worse about it. Is there something I can do to make it up to you?"

        And please, people, don't make excuses.... "But, but... she was saying bad things about the president, and she was doing it at work!" That is totally irrelevant.

        "Any dictator would admire the uniformity and obedience of the U.S. media." -- Noam Chomsky

        by ratmach on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 12:08:02 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Give me a break... (3+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          DuzT, second gen, Naniboujou

          Being lower class doesn't make someone an angel.  There are plenty of lower class people who are complete idiots, and/or assholes.  Just because someone is poor doesn't mean they're a great person, or worthy of undue sympathy.  

        •  The diarist already has one up on me. (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          Diogenes2008, DuzT

          I never would have apologized. I've worked customer service, and you don' talk shit like she did, no matter how tired you are.

          But then, we know if the diarist had gotten mad at her for complaining to him about losers who come through the line with food stamps, you would have applauded him for sticking up for the down trodden. BECAUSE it was over the president, ya'all are just beside yourself with the vapors over it.

          If I wanted government in my uterus, I'd fuck a senator

          by second gen on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 07:32:23 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  Oh my god (1+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            VetGrl

            Clearly you have paid NO attention to me (and any of my "friends" here) over the years. Because this...

            But then, we know if the diarist had gotten mad at her for complaining to him about losers who come through the line with food stamps, you would have applauded him.
            ... is about as inaccurate as it gets. The key for me was NOT what the diarist was defending or complaining about, and NOT what the woman was defending, etc. The key is the details about the woman, the PERSON.  Age, demeanor, physical and emotional health, etc.  And so you are 100% wrong. Had the argument been over your hypothetical (food stamps), I would feel EXACTLY the same as I do now. Oh no doubt I'd agree with the guy's views over the woman's, but I would be totally on HER side once he decided to verbally abuse her. Makes no difference to me whether he's the most leftwing or rightwing person on earth, or whether she is.

            "Any dictator would admire the uniformity and obedience of the U.S. media." -- Noam Chomsky

            by ratmach on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 12:39:11 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

    •  Well, you know, like the title says (3+ / 0-)

      The diarist had the chance to apologize - it didn't say he actually apologized . . ..

    •  Well, she WAS in the wrong. (7+ / 0-)

      Voicing one's personal political opinions while on company time like she did at customers like she did is utterly, completely unacceptable.  She is VERY lucky she still has a job.  Were I here manager, I would have chewed her out royally for what she did.  

      Rule 101 of customer service is that you behave pleasantly and avoid behaving in a way that might offend/upset them on matters such as, oh, politics, religion, moral views, etc.  

      The diarist acted like a dick in the first encounter, yes.  But he at least made an effort to apologize and rectify the situation.  Making excuses for the unacceptable behavior of the clerk doesn't make any damn sense.

    •  Wow. Just ... wow. (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      DuzT, Diogenes2008

      He did apologize. A couple of times. He's trying to understand why his apology didn't get the reaction he expected.

      Being the single intellectual in a village of 1,100 souls ain't much fun, especially when 1,099 of those don't think you're all that smart.--Lucy Marsden

      by Miniaussiefan on Sat Apr 28, 2012 at 04:19:23 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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