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View Diary: My father was a soldier (163 comments)

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  •  My father died before our long estrangement... (9+ / 0-)

    could come to an end.  The bitterest irony was that the values I held most dear, I learned from him.  He couldn't recognize them, and at the time, the intensity of the conflict between us blinded me to their source.

    I ultimately made peace.  It's tragic that we could not find it together while he was still drawing breath.  But the agonies have long been quelled, and I can now celebrate his life and the many blessings in my own life I can trace to or through him.

    I pray no less for you.

    (P.S.  I wish I were on your Christmas list.  But I have a Powell's account, so I can handle it myself.)

    •  Thank you (4+ / 0-)

      I had tried for almost 30 years to have a connection with him.  Once I  had children and the cycle of abuse and denial invaded their lives, I let go.  Not with anger, but with a need to protect my children... as well as myself.  

      It was also depleting me, trying to connect with a man who quite frankly was nothing but abandonment.  

      He was very happy that I was in some way involved in the Peace Movement.  If anything he found great solace in that I had raised my kids in a non-violent, non-guilt/shame space.  That I hadn't raised a bunch of Republicans. :)

      But it was time to let go again after our brief reconnect.  He lives a life that is full of risks and criminal dangers.  I think he even realized that his presence was harmful to the kids.  

      I let go with love.  For myself, my children and for him as well.  Both times.  Thank you for your concern and sharing your story of strength :)

      "When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace." ~Jimi Hendrix

      by Damnit Janet on Sun Jun 17, 2012 at 12:45:28 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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