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View Diary: Homophobic Slurs Are OK If You Don't Mean Them (280 comments)

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  •  I understand that there is language I can not use (7+ / 0-)

    because of who I am and because of I am not. As a middle aged white guy who is straight and therefore privileged I try to respect the feelings of others. As an ally of the LGBT community for the past 36 years and as the parent of a trans-gendered son I am painfully aware of how thoughtless comments can hurt. I am also aware that "meaning well" is not enough, you have to be aware of what you are saying.

    My father had racist views and expressed racist opinions. My mother was open minded and tolerant and taught me at an early age to be respectful and tolerant of all people. I hear both voices in my head. I hear my father's voice when I see a young black person coming towards me, and I feel my self jumping to conclusions. But I also hear my mother's voice of tolerance and respect. So I have to work at it. Daily. I have to fight the bigotry.

    So what I would ask for is for everyone to take some time for self reflection. To examine our beliefs and our judgments. We are not perfect. But we can try.

    And we can try to understand when someone disagrees with us and try to understand their needs and hopes and disappointments.

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