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View Diary: If I could take a pill to be straight.... (119 comments)

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  •  As someone who self-identifies as bi-sexual (19+ / 0-)

    I would take a pill if it was available. I came out as teh gay when I was a junior in high school and have only recently felt comfortable self-identifying as a bisexual male. Even when I knew I had feelings for both genders I was fearful of the term bisexual and the 'negative' in my own brain images it summoned up.

    Over time and years I grew to accept the fact that yes I am bisexual, but it is something I am not totally comfortable with. It is my own internalized phobia about being bi, I readily admit this.

    I would take a pill to either be gay or straight totally.

    Ok, I've muttered long enough, not sure if this makes any sense to anyone but me, but it is how I am. :)

    I'll tell you what justice is. Justice is a knee in the gut from the floor on the chin at night sneaky with a knife brought up down on the magazine of a battleship sandbagged underhanded in the dark without a word of warning.

    by BFSkinner on Fri Jul 06, 2012 at 08:24:42 PM PDT

    •  It makes sense (9+ / 0-)

      I hope that your phobia eases up soon, 'cause FSM knows we certainly aren't going to find a pill ;-)

      Thanks for sharing, and I'm glad that you are who you are.

      P.S. I am not a crackpot.

      by BoiseBlue on Fri Jul 06, 2012 at 08:29:44 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  Actually if we don't blow ourselves up or have (0+ / 0-)

        a massive collapse of civilization due to climate change or peak oil we WILL have a pill to change sexual orientation or more accurately, enable changing of sexual orientation at will.  Not to mention other things such as safely eliminating pain without causing other problems like accidentally injuring yourself and not knowing it.  Remember that everything we are, everything we experience, our very identities and our experiential universes are simply that which we are processing and generating in our minds (or souls, if you prefer).

        There is no saving throw against stupid.

        by Throw The Bums Out on Fri Jul 06, 2012 at 09:19:51 PM PDT

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    •  Maybe you can find a pill for the phobia nt (5+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      BFSkinner, JeffW, blueoasis, Em, Kitsap River
    •  Thank you for bringing this up. (10+ / 0-)

      A lot of people think self-identifying as bisexual is a stepping stone on the way to admitting being gay.  And I'm sure it has been for many people.  

      But there's also plenty of biphobia out there, and not just from straight people.  Some gays and lesbians (particularly "political lesbians"... which is different from being political and being a lesbian...) seem to think bis are immature, in denial, inherently untrustworthy or even traitors.

      And our internalized phobias are sometimes the hardest to overcome.

      FWIW: I am bi, and I would not take an either/or pill.

      •  There Is Something That Is Troubling About This (0+ / 0-)


        To me it conjures up the thought that something is wrong with being gay, so it's phrased as an "admission".

        Or that one is "guilty" of being gay, so must "admit".

        Honestly do people "admit" they have blue eyes or brown hair?


        admitting being gay.

        The Republican Party is Simply a Coalition of Greed and Hate

        by kerplunk on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 08:56:06 AM PDT

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        •  I meant admit to themselves, as much as anyone. (0+ / 0-)

          And because our society is so deeply homo-, bi-, and trans-phobic, and internalized phobia wreaks such havoc on LGBTs, it can be a matter of admitting it.

          This is not a commentary on the moral status of being LGBT, but on how it feels to be LGBT in a heterosexist and homophobic society.

    •  I think in between places are often (5+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      cai, BFSkinner, JeffW, Kitsap River, Avilyn

      uncomfortable. I hope some day soon we can all be more at ease with folks who are 2-4 Kinsey - nothing else is black and white (not even blacks and whites).

      Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? . . . and respect the dignity of every human being.

      by Wee Mama on Fri Jul 06, 2012 at 09:05:52 PM PDT

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    •  Perhaps there are aspects to being bi that (8+ / 0-)

      I don't comprehend but I would think it awesome to be able to relate sexually to both men and women. As a full 6 on the Kinsey scale, I have to figure I'm missing something by having no sexual interest in women.

      Just another faggity fag socialist fuckstick homosinner!

      by Ian S on Fri Jul 06, 2012 at 09:11:07 PM PDT

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      •  Woody Allen once said, (5+ / 0-)

        "Bisexuality means never having to worry about a date for Saturday night." (Shows how little he knew about the subject.)

        I've only recently started "coming out" as a straight-identifying bisexual...meaning that while I'm in a monogamous male-female relationship, I can freely acknowledge my attraction to other females. So if my spouse and I are watching Pauley Perrette on NCIS and he says, "Hey, I'd do her," I can reply, "Yeah, me too." ;-)

        As someone mentioned above, there is a lot of biphobia out there -- possibly because, especially for those of us who limit ourselves to one primary gender, bisexuality seems to reinforce the myths that gender preference is a choice even amongst gay men and lesbians. Who knows?

        Mitt Romney: the Etch-A-Sketch candidate in the era of YouTube

        by Cali Scribe on Fri Jul 06, 2012 at 10:48:20 PM PDT

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        •  People don't do nuance. (3+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          Kitsap River, Avilyn, BFSkinner

          They insist you jump in one box or another. Good on you for being able to express the other feelings you have and your husband for understanding, too, apparently without feeling threatened.

        •  Me too (5+ / 0-)

          I'm a bisexual woman married to a straight man, in a monogamous relationship by choice. Both of us have had quite a bit of experience with polyamory, good and bad, and decided early on to be monogamous, at least for the foreseeable future.

          I don't know that I'd call myself "straight-identified", though. I think of myself as bi-identified but able to pass. I choose not to. But unlike BoiseBlue, my livelihood doesn't potentially hang in the balance. I can understand where she's coming from.

          Organ donors save lives! A donor's kidney gave me my life back on 02/18/11; he lives on in me. Please talk with your family about your wish to donate.

          Why are war casualty counts "American troops" and "others" but never "human beings"?

          by Kitsap River on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 04:09:29 AM PDT

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        •  Woody Allen also said, "Don't knock masturbation. (1+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:

          … It's sex with someone I love."

          The Dutch kids' chorus Kinderen voor Kinderen wishes all the world's children freedom from hunger, ignorance, and war.

          by lotlizard on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 04:47:49 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

    •  We wind up being looked askance at by both sides (4+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      BoiseBlue, orlbucfan, Avilyn, BFSkinner

      Ever been told to just make up your mind and be straight or gay? A lot of us have.

      You're OK just the way you are, BFS. Take it from another bisexual.

      Organ donors save lives! A donor's kidney gave me my life back on 02/18/11; he lives on in me. Please talk with your family about your wish to donate.

      Why are war casualty counts "American troops" and "others" but never "human beings"?

      by Kitsap River on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 04:01:23 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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