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View Diary: Japan's 'Hydrangea Revolution' in Full Swing! (41 comments)

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  •  Thanks for your kind comment, Joieau. I' ve been (12+ / 0-)

    a big slump for a while.  My writing here seems to run in big cycles.  Six year ago I had written about 150 then went into a four year slump where I only commented, then last year a couple hundred more, then whammo, hardly two in the last year.    

    My ex-significant other and I broke up unexpectly, in February, after we stayed up for three nights trying to move her out of old house, into a new one we spent about six months finding.  In our ten year together, we've broken up before, then gotten back together, once after a year.  

    She has severe bi-polar, and maybe incipient Alzeimers, and big changes to about 8 powerful meds, so I sometimes have trouble telling what it a symptom and what is a choice.  I'm reminded of the song by the group Offstream, called "No Self-Esteem" with the key line, "if she keeps this up, I might just say something."   But, we are through, this time, as I'm starting to find this annoying.

    But, when my life is in tatters, I feel like an escapist if I spend so much time writing post.  Also, it disrupts my concentration.  

    I may write again one day.  

    The means is the ends in the process of becoming. - Mahatma Gandhi

    by HoundDog on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 05:20:40 PM PDT

    [ Parent ]

    •  I'm sorry to hear about (11+ / 0-)

      personal issues in such an important relationship. Hope it works out for the best - for both of you - however 'best' turns out to be.

      I know about the escapist feeling. I've got livestock (dogs, cats, house birds, ducks...) to care for daily, grandkids and friends/SOs to feed and do laundry for (in college), a big garden to tend, an orchard ready to drop apples, quickly ripening grapes of three varieties, a space that needs perpetual mowing and our mower's kaput so all I've got is a weed-eater that won't start without a fight...

      ...always something. So, hey. We can't REALLY escape too much by spending time here, can we? §;o)

    •  Correction - the group that wrote No Self Esteem (4+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Joieau, koNko, ozsea1, TiaRachel

      was OffSpring, not Offstream.  Yikes.  I am in a slump.

      The means is the ends in the process of becoming. - Mahatma Gandhi

      by HoundDog on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 08:23:47 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  FYI Link to aptly poignant OffSpring song. (4+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Joieau, koNko, ozsea1, TiaRachel

        http://www.youtube.com/...

        Self Esteem lyrics
        Songwriters: Holland, Bryan Keith;

        I wrote her off for the tenth time today
        And practiced all the things I would say
        But she came over, I lost my nerve
        I took her back and made her dessert

        Now I know I'm being used
        That's okay man 'cause I like the abuse
        Well, I know she's playing with me
        That's okay 'cause I've got no self esteem

        Oh wayo, yeah, yeah
        Oh yeah, yeah
        Oh yeah, yeah, yeah
        Oh yeah, yeah

        We make plans to go out at night
        I wait till 2 then I turn out the light
        This rejection's got me so low
        If she keeps it up I just might tell her so

        Oh wayo, yeah, yeah
        Oh, yeah, yeah
        Oh yeah, yeah, yeah
        Oh, yeah, yeah

        When she's saying, all that she wants only me
        Then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends
        When she saying, all men are like a disease
        Then I wonder how much more I can spend

        Well I guess, I should stick up for myself
        From:
        But I really think it's better this way
        The more you suffer
        The more it shows you really care, right? Yeah

        Now I'll relate, this little bit
        That happens more than I'd like to admit
        Late at night, she knocks on my door
        She's drunk again and looking to score

        Now I know, I should say no, but
        That's kind of hard when she's ready to go
        I may be dumb, but I'm not a dweeb
        I'm just a sucker with no self esteem

        Oh wayo, yeah, yeah
        Oh yeah, yeah
        Oh yeah, yeah, yeah
        Oh yeah, yeah

        When she's saying, all that she wants only me
        Then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends
        When she's saying, all that I'm like a disease
        Then I wonder how much more I can spend

        Well I guess, I should stick up for myself
        But I really think it's better this way
        The more you suffer
        The more it shows you really care, right? Yeah

        these lyrics are last corrected by marq upton

        The means is the ends in the process of becoming. - Mahatma Gandhi

        by HoundDog on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 08:39:16 PM PDT

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      •  Heh. I don't even know (5+ / 0-)

        what fucking day it is! [see above comments, where I go from Sunday to Saturday... at least I know it's a weekend. When you get to be my age, that's something...]

        •  lol, Tell me about it. Last night I wrote a (5+ / 0-)

          comment complaining of the 103 degree heat in central PA, that didn't occur until today.  I've been reading all the week long forcasts and somehow arrived at the conclusion that last night was Saturday, when it was only Fri, (and the heat "only" had got up to 97 with like 70% humidity by that time.)  

          But, I still got over a half dozen tips, perhaps out of sympathy for my confusion.  

          The means is the ends in the process of becoming. - Mahatma Gandhi

          by HoundDog on Sat Jul 07, 2012 at 08:48:01 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

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