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View Diary: Tree Climbers: I was a kid - you were a man (Republished) (17 comments)

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  •  thank you for sharing this poem with us, (3+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    Avilyn, CherryTheTart, blueyedace2

    dear Roxine.

    The answer is - we can't make people understand, not if you look at it as all people all the time.

    But we can get people to understand, one man, one woman, one child at a time. Each to their own level of understanding.

    And we can protect children, one child at a time. This one up the street, and that one in India.

    I am very sorry that a man in your life did to you what you described in your poem.

    I do not blame you at all. I say there is no shame in being abused.

    Let those who were abused speak. Let those who survive speak. Let those who thrive speak. We will listen.

    •  Thanks 2thanks - I've been "blocked" the last (4+ / 0-)

      few days - couldn't write anything...and then this morning, I got to work, put on my headset to listen to some Pandora radio - and a country song came on by Gord Bamford (I had never heard of it or him) but the chorus is:

      ~Imagine life without toy trains
      Disneyworld and finger paint
      Bedtime stories, goodnight kisses
      Blowin' birthday candle wishes
      And bein' what we'd like to be again - kids

      Some have it all, some don't have a chance
      and some look up at life without a mom or dad
      Live with a choice they never had
      Born in that situation
      But everyone of them is a gift from God
      Whether anybody ever tells 'em or not
      One of a kind little snapshot
      of His imagination and they're all His - kids

      And as I was listening to it, the words "empty vessel" came into my mind - and I knew it was time to write.

      So I opened up a word document and this poured out of me.  

      I've been struggling with my advocacy on a lot of the Pennsylvania online newspapers trying to find a way to reach them - to make them understand what it's like for the victims.  Because many just don't want to think about it - because to accept the truth of what child sexual abuse does to little kids - is to then understand why we must hold accountable not only the perpetrator, but those who knew and failed to do enough - or anything in some cases.  

      Anyway - thanks for reading.  I'm doing ok, for the most part.  Some days, like today - I get a little too close to it and it threatens to overcome me - the pain, sadness, sorrow, hurt, anger, hatred - but writing this, getting it out there helps.  

      While I don't know who said it, the quote "a burden shared is a burden half, while a joy shared is doubled" comes to mind.  Thanks for sharing some of my burden...

      "...I am the master of my fate/I am the captain of my soul" Invictus - William Ernest Henley Please donate to TREE Climbers, our 501(c)(3).

      by Roxine on Wed Aug 01, 2012 at 09:31:21 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  Music is a powerful tool (3+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        2thanks, Roxine, blueyedace2

        Have you ever heard "Code of Silence" by Billy Joel?  It was on his The Bridge album, which I bought for another song ("This is the Time"), but I ended up listening to "Code of Silence" on repeat (well, rewind and play, actually, since I had the cassette).  It in part is what enabled me to write the poem I did.  Part of the lyrics:

        But you swore to yourself a long time ago
        There were some things that people never needed to know
        This is one that you keep
        That you bury so deep
        No one can tear it out

        And you can't talk about it
        Because you're following a code of silence
        You're never gonna to lose the anger
        You just deal with it a different way

        And you can't talk about it
        And isn't that a kind of madness
        To be living by a code of silence
        When you've really got a lot to say

        The Girl Who Loved Stories
        I’m a feminist because the message is still "don’t get raped" not "don’t rape"

        by Avilyn on Wed Aug 01, 2012 at 10:04:21 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

      •  I think while you were blocked (5+ / 0-)

        other places in you or voices in you were slowly working on this beautiful and meaningful poem. Sometimes writing is waiting.

      •  Dear Abbie ... (3+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Avilyn, Roxine, blueyedace2

        Just a thought ... If any columns like Dear Abbie still exist, write to them and ask how you can get through to people.

        You might get some good answers, and their published answers might get people thinking about csa and the whole changing-what-is-acceptable-to-talk-about constraints or courtesy or politeness of our society.

      •  Hey there, Roxine. (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Roxine, blueyedace2

        I thought I recognized you. I've been observing from afar on some of the same forums.

        Thank you for sharing my burden.

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