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View Diary: Here's that story CNN doesn't want you to see about how ladies vote with their periods (186 comments)

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  •  It IS all about bodies (4+ / 0-)

    A friend and I walked into a gay bar once by mistake -- too dark and smoky to see much at first, just a bar -- but I had a weird feeling. Somewhat antsy. After a while I could see it was all guys, some making out -- And almost all of them checking me out. I could tell by their eyes, their expressions-- "hmmm, nice piece of meat". We left in a few minutes, but I had the keen sense that what I felt in that bar was what women in public feel all the time -- eyes going over their bodies, that sense of being evaluated by strangers and passer-bys. Checking out your sexual parts.
    I think this is the basis of men's homophobia -- the fear, the anger that THEY  are being looked at and thought of by gay men the way the straight men look at and think of women. And it frightens them to death.
    I'm not bothered by gay men nor sexually aroused by lesbians making out. Guess I'm a weirdo.

    Ash-sha'b yurid isqat an-nizzam!

    by fourthcornerman on Wed Oct 24, 2012 at 09:07:31 PM PDT

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    •  I don't know you, but . . . (0+ / 0-)

      you might want to rethink this comment.  You walk into a gay bar, and you think "almost all" of the men are checking you out.  Don't you think you might be flattering yourself just a bit?  Straight guys always have this idea that every gay man is just dying to get into their pants.  But the truth is, most of you just aren't that desirable.  Nor are we as sexually omniverous as you seem to think.

      I'm sure you didn't mean anything by this, so I don't want to make a big deal of it, but I hear this from straight guys all the time when they somehow wander into a gay environment.  You all seem to think you're just irresistible to gay men and that when you're in a crowd of gay guys, all eyes are on you.  Take it from me, that's your discomfort and insecurity talking.

      As someone who's been walking into gay bars -- on purpose -- for decades, I can pretty much guarantee you that most of the guys in that bar didn't so much as notice you.

      "Ça c'est une chanson que j'aurais vraiment aimé ne pas avoir écrite." -- Barbara

      by FogCityJohn on Wed Oct 24, 2012 at 11:04:58 PM PDT

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      •  Wrong choice of words (0+ / 0-)

        I didn't mean "sexually" checking me out, just that i was looked over -- to see who I was, whether it was someone they recognized or knew, or just curious -- but the point was I don't get looked at -- even cursorily-- by every male when I walk into a bar, store, restuarant, gas station, etc, which is what I KNOW happens to almost every woman who does. Just watch the men in a place when a woman comes into view. It's that universal and unceasing scrutiny, even if only a quick glance, that would certainly make me feel uncomfortable in public.
        As for myself -- does having a guy come on to me while we're both naked (and alone) in a YMCA shower mean that I AM attractive? I have no homophobia nor fear nor  insecurity that men want to use me sexually. Nor do I think gay men  are continuously on the prowl.

        Ash-sha'b yurid isqat an-nizzam!

        by fourthcornerman on Fri Oct 26, 2012 at 08:24:25 PM PDT

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