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View Diary: Guy-To-Girl + Girl-To-Guy = True Love (16 comments)

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  •  It's a great story, but there is one thing that (5+ / 0-)

    strikes me about it and makes me uncomfortable.

    Katie added: 'Even from age three, I knew deep down I wanted to be a girl. All I wanted was to play with dolls. I hated my boy body and never felt right in it.
    Arin's mother Denise, 41, encouraged him to compete in local pageant contests and he became an accomplished female ballet and clogging dancer.

    But Arin's secret love was riding motocross bikes with his father Mitch, 42, and doing triathlons and rock-climbing.

    Something about the tone of the article makes it feel like gender is about the stuff you want to play with as a child. Like, she was a boy because she didn't like girly toys.

    I like the story, but that bothers me. It is hard for me to articulate why it does, but it does. It seems to be reducing gender-identity issues down to a very shallow level.

    •  You're right - I've had the... (4+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      rserven, ThatPoshGirl, Ahianne, Wee Mama

      ...same feeling hit me whenever I read about that side of the issue.  It almost seems like it should be just a marginally relevant note.  Would love to have more input on this.

    •  It is an article from the Daily Mail. (6+ / 0-)

      They are not exactly experts on the subject.  In fact, they are mostly known for exploiting us.

    •  I know what you mean... (4+ / 0-)

      These stories often leave me with the feeling that it isn't possible to be a straight person, female in gender identification, and yet to like stereotypically "male" activities, etc., or vice versa. And of course that is silly. But I don't think it's the message intended. I think the ballet and rock-climbing stories must be partly just a way to make the identity experience concrete to readers. If you just say "I always felt like I was really a girl" people have trouble getting it and also it doesn't make much of an article! And of course if people are unable to do the things they want to because they are the "wrong" sex, it is an ongoing frustration, and something they are likely to want to tell about.

      This is a touching story and it is great to see these young people looking so happy and at home with themselves and each other. Yay!

    •  If I were to try to describe my parents' views on (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:

      gender, I might call it "gender essentialism." Look at the anatomy, that's what you are. In some respects it can be liberating, because nothing you do and nothing you don't do can affect whether you fulfill your gender. It was understood that there were conventions that differed by gender - girls were expected to wear dresses, for example - but wearing dresses didn't make you a girl and not wearing dresses didn't stop you from being a girl. I suspect this was part of why my brother and I could do unconventional things - I ended up as a scientist and he ended up as an artist, and neither of us got any flack from our parents for that.

      Renee Richards was in the news in my teens. I have no memories of how my parents reacted to that news, but likely it was just folded into the idea that there are exceptions to any rule.

      Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? . . . and respect the dignity of every human being.

      by Wee Mama on Sat Nov 10, 2012 at 07:17:42 PM PST

      [ Parent ]

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