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View Diary: Breaking:Eric Cantor involved in outing of Petraeus (346 comments)

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  •  Which is why having an affair is a big deal. (7+ / 0-)

    It's not the sex. It's the lover's triangles that get set up and then people do crazy things, and sometimes become homicidal.

    •  Also having an affair (11+ / 0-)

      (...and I'm talking about big, high profiel married people with lots of lose kind of affairs, not the 'oops I got drunk and slept with a cocktail waitress on the road' kind...not that it's any more ethically acceptable)...

      ...involves a necessary shift in thinking.  It means necessarily living an outer reality that is different from your inner reailty.  Which means having to justify cognitive dissonance every day of your life, and to accept a kind of 'denial' version of reality. And to alter every action, every word that comes out of your mouth to match up to that new version.

      Once you're in that bubble of cognitive dissonance/denial, more bad judgments follow from there. (Just ask the Fox News folk.) Because your frame of reality is split.  

      Or the old saw, "Oh what a tangled web we weave."

      People get caught up in tangled webs and can't get out.  It's the basic construct for a lot of grea film noir storylines.

      "The ignorant mind, with its infinite afflictions, passions, and evils, is rooted in the three poisons. Greed, anger, and delusion." - Bodhidharma

      by hopesprings on Sun Nov 11, 2012 at 08:27:34 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

    •  In this case I have hard time understanding (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      LilithGardener, Cliss

      why she had an affair with him.   He looks older than his age and he is ugly (at least in my opinion).   On the other hand she is quite attractive.   She could do much better than that.

      •  I'll take a stab at it (5+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        jlb1972, KenBee, PorridgeGun, CanyonWren, Cliss

        1. She was writing her disertation, that involves years of long boring, painful research. Few get to choose a contemporary figure highly placed in an ongoing long war.  That is a historian's dream - to have access to the front line view.

        2. To publish her thesis, it had to be something the public would want to buy.

        3. She is clearly a predator, and had become attached to some kind of glamour associated with her role as the general's biographer.

        4. Having an affair gave her the power to blackmail him in the future. It gave her some kind of power and access to something she desired for her future. (She called him her mentor.)

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