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View Diary: What drove you nuts in the middle of all the thankfulness? (177 comments)

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  •  The unplanned drop-in by the neighbors... (30+ / 0-)

    ...with their dog.  The 4 month old puppy.  

    Don't get me wrong, these are good neighbors as far as neighbors go.  They do for us the things we all hope neighbors will do in times of need.  Rides to the car repair place or the airport, dog sitting, mail-gathering, etc.  And -- bonus -- a nearly unlimited supply of homegrown tomatoes.  All good.

    Still, Neighbor Dad is pretty much a FOX News kind of guy, and it was only a few minutes into the visit (but already his second beer) that we got to hear that unions killed Twinkies and HoHos.  The slightly bigoted commentary (who uses "ebonics" as a term anyway?).  For once I thought I would get all the way through Thanksgiving winger-free.  I was wrong.

    Still, those tomatoes are pretty damn good.

    dissent not only welcome... but encouraged

    by newfie53523 on Thu Nov 22, 2012 at 07:14:29 PM PST

    •  Wow I have had some neighbors over the years (5+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      emeraldmaiden, JeffW, Delilah, DvCM, Julia Grey

      that were nice, some drove us nuts, but none ever just dropped in. Now with my parents, their neighbors always just dropped in.   But , mostly everyone know , we hae to invite them over.  I have to admit, we are not all that happy with the pop in type of people in this day and age where they can text, email or call first.  But I realize that is probably just my thing as my parents and sister would get pop ins all of the time.

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      by wishingwell on Thu Nov 22, 2012 at 08:06:27 PM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  Neighbors dropping in on Thanksgiving (3+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        rainmanjr, DvCM, Julia Grey

        Okay, I've got a weird T-day story about that from 3 years ago.  I'm still a bit miffed about it.

        My family is from the East Coast and I moved to California, and yes, I admit I moved to get some distance between us.  I can handle seeing them once or twice a year, but not constantly, and believe me, if I lived there it would be constant.  These people have zero sense of boundaries.

        Now, I usually don't visit for Thanksgiving, but my dad was struggling with lung cancer issues, and this was clearly the last Thanksgiving he'd have.  So I flew out minus the husband and kids, and my sister-in-law and my brother really wanted him to spend the meal at their house.  They said they wouldn't invite the usual 40-60 people if he'd agree to join them.  So he very reluctantly agreed, as he really didn't want people to see how downhill he'd gone, plus, being around more people was likely to get him even sicker.

        So we sit down for our meal around 3:30 or so, and as we're finishing the soup, the doorbell rings.  And it's the neighbors.  With their mom.  And, given everything I've just told you, wouldn't you expect that my brother and SIL would tell them nice to see you, we're eating, we'll come by later?  Noooooooo.  They invite them all in, and now we've all gotten up out of our seats, including my going-to-die-in-two-months-from-cancer dad.  

        And they then proceed to talk to us in the fvcking hallway for 20 minutes.  They're in no hurry to leave, and neither bro nor sis will encourage them to return to their walk.  The dining room is right off the front hallway, so they can see there is food on the table and that we had sat down.  So I'm still trying to figure out who was ruder here, them for not leaving right away when they saw we had started dinner, or bro/sis for not encouraging them out when they had promised my dad a quiet thanksgiving without all those extra people.

        I really think the both of them use friends and neighbors as buffers so they don't have to have any kind of intimate conversations, because every time I've visited there has always been somebody over there, and literally as soon as one leaves, another arrives.  Phone is constantly ringing too.  Given that they've never encouraged any of these people to leave so they can spend some quiet time with visiting family, I assume that's the way they want it, but that time at Thanksgiving?  That was weird.  And rude.

        •  Yes, I know people like that, you cannot visit (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          DvCM, madhaus

          them or fly across country to see them without all their neighbors and friends popping in all of the time.

          When my Mom was going through chemo, neighbors would just walk right in and one time, they almost walked in on me undressing as it was just Mom, me and my husband visiting and I was trying on some clothes that Mom could no longer wear.  So we had the hall door and bedroom doors open.  Mom then decided to lock her doors because I told her it was ridiculous her neighbors were just strolling in the house without knocking and walking through her house anytime of the day and night.

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          by wishingwell on Fri Nov 23, 2012 at 06:16:31 AM PST

          [ Parent ]

          •  I told Mom since they all had a key to check on (2+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            DvCM, madhaus

            her, they could ring the doorbell and if no answer, use their key. But seeing a car in the driveway that was ours and not just hers, they knew she had family there for the holiday. And they just walked in and stayed.

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            by wishingwell on Fri Nov 23, 2012 at 06:17:42 AM PST

            [ Parent ]

      •  My dad never went anywhere without calling. (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        DvCM, wishingwell

        He considered just popping in rude even in the 70's

        •  Sane with my parents when for about a year, (1+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          DvCM

          I rented an apartment less than 10 miles from them. But they always called me and never popped in at my house or anywhere else for that matter. So that is how I was raised but then my parents though had an open door policy so they got the pop ins but never did it to others.

          Follow PA Keystone Liberals on Twitter: @KeystoneLibs

          by wishingwell on Fri Nov 23, 2012 at 06:14:04 AM PST

          [ Parent ]

        •  We had a friend call. We said, "No." (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          DvCM, Julia Grey

          Long story, but the essence is she turned down every scenario from her family to hold Thanksgiving herself, insisting she wanted her 9-months-preggo daughter to do it -- not happening, as you'd expect.

          Guess her plans to have turkey with her fellow condo-dwellers "fell through." If she'd called a couple of days or weeks before, we would have happily accommodated her. You don't invite yourself to Thanksgiving on Thanksgiving Day -- period.

          "If you're going to go down with the ship, make it a submarine." - Wayne Shorter

          by Oliver Tiger on Fri Nov 23, 2012 at 06:18:37 AM PST

          [ Parent ]

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