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View Diary: NFL player commits suicide in front of coaches. Oh, and he killed his girlfriend. (242 comments)

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  •  Haven't seen these numbers... (1+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    ebohlman

    numbers I have seen told a different story. This is my frustration with alot of the writing and even the research on these issues. I can't really trust any of it because the people behind it have agendas.

    You don't have to look very far to find folks who will insist that our system is horribly biased against men and that women are evil, manipulative wanna be amazons. And they've got plenty of data to go with their anecdotal horror stories of domestic dysfunction. But they're presenting a very slanted view of things.

    Likewise, I found this post troubling, as it assumes that no one cares about the victim because of hew sex. It seems much more likely to me that this is because she is not a professional athlete. When SNL star Phil Hartman was murdered by his wife, he was the focus of reporting because he was the celebrity, not her. It didn't matter who the victim was, it mattered who was famous. That doesn't paint a flattering picture of our society and it's priorities, by any means. But I just don't see the sexism you accuse in the reporting of this story.

    If this guy was nobody, and his girlfriend a famous athlete, and he had been murdered by her... who do you suppose we'd be hearing about right now? Like I said, I understand people are upset. But the "men are shit" slant isn't really productive or fair. DV isn't the fault of just one sex. It's a complex problem that is sometimes husband on wife, sometimes the other way around. Sometimes it's fathers, sometimes mothers. Sometimes it's both.

    I had experience with DV as a kid. I want it stopped. Making it about men vs. women is unhelpful. I disagree that the reporting is sexist. Classist yes. Sexist, no.

    You can do whatever you want to us, but we're not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America.

    by Eric Stratton on Mon Dec 03, 2012 at 01:56:16 PM PST

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    •  Where did your numbers come from? n/t (1+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Onomastic

      "As the madmen play on words, and make us all dance to their song / to the tune of starving millions, to make a better kind of gun..." -- Iron Maiden

      by Lost Left Coaster on Mon Dec 03, 2012 at 02:25:47 PM PST

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      •  The internet, lol. (0+ / 0-)

        It was from a particular period of time. Don't know the methodology used.

        You can do whatever you want to us, but we're not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America.

        by Eric Stratton on Mon Dec 03, 2012 at 07:45:31 PM PST

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        •  Just curious (1+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          Eric Stratton

          I live in Canada and just saw the numbers for 2011 for this country. Out of 89 intimate partner homicides in 2011, for 76 the victims were women, for 13 the victims were men. Link here.

          "As the madmen play on words, and make us all dance to their song / to the tune of starving millions, to make a better kind of gun..." -- Iron Maiden

          by Lost Left Coaster on Tue Dec 04, 2012 at 09:11:17 AM PST

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          •  interesting ... (0+ / 0-)

            Women are 51% of the population yet are represented in congress by barely 17%! Until our representation reflects the population, we risk sliding backwards .....

            by 51percent on Tue Dec 04, 2012 at 12:04:23 PM PST

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          •  I wonder what happens... (0+ / 0-)

            if you expand that to cover all domestic relations? Not just intimate ones. Does violence by an estranged ex count? I would think they would include that but just wondering.

            You can do whatever you want to us, but we're not going to sit here and listen to you badmouth the United States of America.

            by Eric Stratton on Tue Dec 04, 2012 at 02:48:57 PM PST

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            •  Eric, you make some interesting points. (0+ / 0-)

              Your memory of some statistics your read once doesn't hold up to the links others have posted.

              And doesn't hold up to my memory or the memory of anyone who pays attention to D.V. statistics.

              I agree with your angles on celebrity and the reality that women also abuse men (and same sex spouses abuse one another!)

              Because of the statistics this is a men vs. women issue. It sucks if you're a man who was a victim, but that doesn't change the numbers.

              Love the username and sig, BTW.

              "Jersey_Boy" was taken.

              by New Jersey Boy on Thu Dec 06, 2012 at 08:45:38 AM PST

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