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View Diary: Thoughts on Raising a Daughter (129 comments)

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  •  Yaaaaaaaaaaay!!! (4+ / 0-)
    ... my mother said, "Is there anything you can't do?" I was completely surprised. I looked at her, and said, "I don't know. Never occurred to me that I couldn't do anything I wanted. I got that from you and Daddy!" My mother shook her head. What a gift from my parents: confidence.
    I'm thrilled spitless that you're teaching your daughter confidence!  That's what every girl needs!  [That is my attitude:  "It never occurred to me that I couldn't do anything I wanted."  No one ever actually taught me that, but that's how I've conducted my entire life from before I could verbalize the notion.]

    My first love was reading from the get-go, and I had a fantastic teacher in first through third grade (the next two were useless).  In first grade when I finished my assignments I taught myself cursive by looking at the examples above the chalk board.  Two room school house [Dad & his siblings had attended the same school].  I had two or three classmates in first grade, they were bussed to other schools by second grade, so I was the only student in my grade from second through sixth grade.  I had no peers, so learned my independence early.  Seventh grade through senior year I had classmates in another school, but I still always felt like a fifth wheel.

    As part of an experimental program, when I was a sophomore the shop and home ec classes exchanged..., and unbeknownst to me, the shop teacher sent my Tom Thumb leather purse and ceramic tray to an industrial arts fair.  As myself and other sophomores were setting up for the junior and senior high school prom banquet in half the gym, I was told my little leather tooled purse won second place and the ceramic dish won honorable mention (the info is now in my scrap books from high school years).  Throughout my adult life, I've done one kind of artsy-fartsy thing or other.  I'm disgustingly creative in multiple ways, and have three tool chests, can sew, and community and summer theatre were my favorite hobbies when I was young.

    As a first-year Baby Boomer, I also had occupations in non-traditional fields dominated by men (law enforcement).

    I could change a tire by myself, add water to the radiator, check and add oil, figure out mileage (my first car was a little '60/61 VW without a gas gauge and a ten gallon tank with a one gallon reserve tank, so I had to figure it out all the time, especially for long trips, so I could be in large towns to gas up when stations were open), and add air to the tires.

    Plus, of course, I was head of my own household, did all my own housework, managed my own finances, etc., and was a single mother, on top of later managing offices, etc.

    About the time guys I dated started telling me how to spend my money or that I should use my talents for x,y,z ideas they had (which would benefit them, not me), I broke off the relationship.  [Naturally, I've arrived at old age still single.  I will NOT be talked down to like I'm a child!  That subject is not open for compromise.]

    Whether male or female, every child-emerging-to-teen-years-and-adulthood should learn the things it takes to manage one's own household without assistance.  One can hope they'll be happily partnered with someone, but what if the other partner dies or their marriage ends in divorce?  It happens.  Someone still has to cook (at least basic, healthy food, even if not gourmet meals), vacuum, sweep, dust, wash and iron clothes, clean the bathroom, change sheets, pick up all the things that make a place look messy, do dishes, how to do minor repairs around the house or hang a picture or a clock (hence, one needs a few basic tools), how to sew on a button or mend a ripped seam by a simple whip stitch, or use a basic sewing machine, know how to make out a check to pay the bills, balance the checking account, make and keep doctor and dentist (or whatever) appointments, keep a car in good repair and serviced (which means dealing with mechanics, so learn the elementary things for vehicle upkeep), how/where to purchase vehicle registration, license tabs, renew a driver's license, how to use a credit card responsibly, or, better yet, how to manage a debit card and not go in debt with credit cards.

    You get the idea.  All the things one must do to be the head of one's own household with no one to rely on to do things for one.

    Hooray to any parent(s) who realize basic knowledge and how to do basic things are important for each of their offspring to learn!

    [P.S.  Your daughter will do just fine.  She has you for a mother...!]


    I'm sick of attempts to steer this nation from principles evolved in The Age of Reason to hallucinations derived from illiterate herdsmen. ~ Crashing Vor

    by NonnyO on Thu Dec 06, 2012 at 09:52:31 PM PST

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