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View Diary: The Postponement of Grief (55 comments)

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  •  dear laurustina, many wiser than I have (6+ / 0-)

    commented already here, and I agree with most of what has been said. (I do not resonate with comments such as "You will see them again.")

    Everyone's grieving process is their own to find and to heal.

    I do not know if your grieving gives you time to cry every day ... if we plug up our grief, we plug up our joy. (You know that.) I do not know if your grieving gives you time to do something for yourself every day.

    For you in particular though, I think your grieving and healing require you to finish your memorial to your daughter and your relationship with her. I think your book will help not just you but many others, parents, and not just those who are grieving.

    I know it is possible to relearn the paths of our thoughts, the paths of our hearts. For me, slowly and gently shifting my grief to gratitude seems to be the way out of despair and physical pain.

    I had to leave my house on an errand before many of the commenters above posted their remarks, and I while gone I thought about what might be missing. I see now though that you have responded to a comment and mentioned guilt. It is no longer missing from the discussion.

    Although I have not yet read everything you have published here on Daily Kos, I can only say that from the view you have given me, the spirit who was Ashlie was blessed to have a mom like you. I cannot say you were perfect, no one is. But you were a splendid mom. I hope you can learn the ways to let go of that aspect of your grief.

    Once again, I am sorry for your loss.

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