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View Diary: Christmas without gifts (27 comments)

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  •  I agree with the sentiment that gift giving (12+ / 0-)

    is out of control here. But I hope people will remember that while many of us don't find gifts necessary, for some people they are an important form of expressing love. A few years ago there was a book that talked about the different love currencies. Some people express love with words, some with touch, some by doing service, etc. But for some people, their primary way of experiencing love is through the giving and getting of gifts.

    My daughter is one of these people. When she was very young, I was worried about her fascination with receiving things. I thought it was too materialistic, too selfish. After I read about love languages, I realized that I was judging her through my prejudices. Yes, she loves to receive things, but they don't have to be valuable. A pretty rock or a pack of gum is just as wonderful to her as something expensive. And she is just as thrilled by giving as receiving. In fact, when she receives a gift, she's very likely to turn and give it to someone else almost immediately. And both exchanges are a delight to her.

    Understanding the value that gifts have for her has made me job as her mother much easier and less stressful. While I know that gifts are far overvalues for most in this society, if you have a loved one who appreciates them for the giving rather than the thing, be grateful, and be sure to get them a gift.

    "The Democrats are the lesser evil and that has to count for something. Good and evil aren't binary states. All of us are both good and evil. Being less evil is the trajectory of morality." --SC

    by tb92 on Sat Dec 22, 2012 at 01:10:02 PM PST

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