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View Diary: The Five Biggest Regrets of the Dying (258 comments)

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  •  And now, for a brief objection (8+ / 0-)

    I always bristle a bit when I read that people regret having worked to much. For me, working has been a way of invalidating all kinds of awful things, including accusations from the time I was young that I was lazy. And lazy. And a waste. And headed for no good. And lazy some more.vnd etc.

    So, for me, working has been a way to find myself, despite what people accused me of and, for that matter, really seemed to want from me.

    I know I'm surely not the only person who's felt this.

    •  work is the only dignity (5+ / 0-)

      Fitzgerald or Hemingway (sorry i can't recall), but i agree with you completely, indubitably.  work can be meaningful in ways that aren't obvious to others, or measured by a paycheck.

      Yes, we need to talk about this. Please sign the dKos Petition to start a national conversation about gun control.

      by Avila on Wed Dec 26, 2012 at 02:56:29 PM PST

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    •  Thanks, indubitably. (1+ / 0-)
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      I've always loved to work, even entry-level crappy jobs. Always things to learn, from the lousy bosses that taught me how not to supervise, to the unexpected friends I would not have gotten to know otherwise. Like the African-American cook who was my boss when I worked in a county jail...brings back such good memories and reminds me of the significant life lessons I learned from her.

      To not be able to pour my whole self into work because of disability has been even harder than having exercise intolerance.

      There is no worse enemy of God and Man than zeal armed with power and guided by a feeble intellect... --William James

      by oslyn7 on Thu Dec 27, 2012 at 02:05:31 AM PST

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      •  Yes. (1+ / 0-)
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        I'm a bit upside down from you, in that I was a sickly kid and didn't really work out my physical problems 'til I was in my early 20's. Once I did, however, I relished working, and I've worked very hard to move myself into a place where I'm doing meaningful work. I love my time at home, and I love my time off work---but I love working, too.

        I have several older people I work with who have retired, gone back to work, tried retiring again, gone back to work again, etc., and not because their lives outside of work were so impoverished, but because they missed all the good things that working brought to their lives.

        It would be very difficult to be unable to work because of disability.

        •  Yeah, it sucks. (1+ / 0-)
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          Although, I am able to function as a volunteer, doing what I can, when I can. My husband and I have alternated being the primary financial support for our family over our 34 years together; it is hard to realize that those roles are now stuck. However, we are back in Africa which has been his dream for two decades and I am grateful to be able to offer support in every way I can.

          Just posted a long comment in another thread on this; it's in the diary on the five greatest regrets dying people have if you are at all interested.

          I hope you are able to work as long as it is meaningful and you love it--and then find your retirement just as good!

          There is no worse enemy of God and Man than zeal armed with power and guided by a feeble intellect... --William James

          by oslyn7 on Thu Dec 27, 2012 at 06:34:19 AM PST

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          •  Thanks! (0+ / 0-)

            I have a close friend who just recently became disabled due to MS. It hit her like a freight train---one day, she was out bobbling around, running to and fro, and the next ... wheelchair bound.

            It's turned her life completely upside down. Interestingly, and something I think you can relate to, her concerns have not been about retrofitting her home, figuring out her marriage and relationships, but what to do for work. She had to switch jobs, but is securely employed, so security isn't the concern. Meaningful work is, however.

            •  yes, (1+ / 0-)
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              I do relate. And...I just realized that my other comment was on this same thread! (Commenting on too many diaries today!)

              MS is awful. How especially awful to have it hit like that. Crazy how many things can change one's life from one day to the next. I hold my life more lightly and my relationships more tightly since my health issues emerged; they certainly have clarified priorities.

              I hope your friend has the support and the creativity she needs to re-craft meaningful work, a meaningful life. I'm glad that she has friends who 'get' her, like you.

              There is no worse enemy of God and Man than zeal armed with power and guided by a feeble intellect... --William James

              by oslyn7 on Thu Dec 27, 2012 at 09:13:55 AM PST

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