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View Diary: My mother-in-law fell tonight, doesn't want to go to the doc. Can I get some advice? (142 comments)

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  •  Pushing her about the hoarding and using outside (1+ / 0-)
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    intervention as what you may perceive as incentive to clear things out is will probably read to her as a threat, and as such is counterproductive. The more afraid she is off losing control of her home and belongings, the less likely she is to allow, much less seek, help. 'Hoarding' is a buzzword and very judgmental sounding, its use is not conducive to addressing any problem that might be present.

    She definitely needs a comprehensive workup and that is your first priority, but after that, if I can suggest doing small corners of tidying in a non-threatening way, asking her about one or two items at a time and chipping away slowly and allowing her to oversee and direct activity, I think you may have better results. It's part of thereaputic interactions, open ended questions, etc, all that from school. :-) Good practice for your new profession. And I would strongly suggest that you try to be more aware of how your comments regarding outside assistance are worded. She may be so afraid of the loss of control that she is feeing more and  more isolated and embattled, something that can definitely impact feelings of depression, and push her more toward an entrenched, reflexive refusal to get help.

    Best of luck and I hope that things improve for all of you.

    Information is abundant, wisdom is scarce. The Druid

    by FarWestGirl on Mon Dec 31, 2012 at 07:38:51 AM PST

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