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View Diary: The Steubenville Gang Rape - A Timeline *Slight Update* (286 comments)

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  •  What are the parents teaching those boys? (9+ / 0-)

    What sick fucks those mothers and fathers are.

    I hold the perpetrators completely responsible for their actions and would like to see them all behind bars for 20 years. But the parents of those kids are responsible for how they brought up their sons.

    That girl is a person. She is someone's precious little girl. I have a little girl and these stories make me shudder. I find it inconceivable that anyone other than psychopath could have so little empathy.

    I hope the victim is getting a lot of help and understands that she has nothing to be ashamed of (except for excess underage drinking, which is kind of dumb, but I did the same thing in high school). And I hope the shame of this follows these boys to their graves. I hope it ruins their lives.

    Does anyone know if there is a fund for the victim?

    •  Oh, you have so much to learn. Your little girl (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      kat herder, ladybug53

      will grow up someday.  And while I'm sure she'll be a fine young lady whom you will be very proud of, trust me (as the mother of two grown sons), she will do one or two things that you will find appalling.  My sons seem to delight in, from time to time, telling me a story that has me holding my hands to my ears and chanting "I can't hear you!".  And I was a good parent.  There are many more factors, especially in a culture that allows violent video games and movies, pornography, and completely free speech.  

      •  She probably won't rape anyone and then... (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:

        ...piss on them, though.

        I don't expect my daughter to be perfect, and yes, I'm sure she'll manage to appall me with something. And yes, I know there are other influences.

        But those parents are members of a community that has demonstrated its family values by trying to protect the football players. I sincerely doubt that those parents are any better than that.

        •  I know several good parents, who did all the right (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          kat herder, ladybug53

          things, whose children became heroin addicts.  One is no longer with us, the other is now a "dancer".  I'm just saying that even the best parents can raise children who somehow take a wrong turn.  Teenagers, well, let's just say they don't always make the best decisions and it's very unfair to blame their parents.  OTOH, I also know several really good kids...who have extremely irresponsible parents.  What I have noticed, with my own sons when they were teenagers, was that girls are right in there with the boys on alot of this crazy stuff kids do, but, the parents of girls are basically all in denial...and always blame the boys!  I lost count of the number of times I called a parent of a girl to warn them of their daughter's dangerous behavior, only to have basically been called a liar ("not my daughter").  So, a word to the wise:  Keep an eye on her, no matter how mature and responsible she seems, because those teenage years can wreak havoc on a family, lol.  Good luck!

          •  This was more than a wrong turn. (2+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            DarkLadyNyara, ladybug53

            I don't agree with your point of view because I do not see this appalling behavior as a difference in degree. I see it as a difference in kind.

            I could be wrong, but I don't see this in he same class as self-destructive behavior like addiction. I see it as a brutal, sustained assault that revealed some very specific attitudes towards gender. I see it as character, not momentary behavior.

            I'll definitely keep your advice in mind, though. Thanks much.

            •  Look, I'm just saying you cannot blame the actions (2+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              kat herder, ladybug53

              of someone who is an adult, or almost an adult, on their parents.  My kids have done some things I am not very proud of, and like I said, I did all the right things as far as parenting is concerned.

              •  And I'm saying that when certain lines... (1+ / 0-)
                Recommended by:
                home solar

                ...are crossed in certain ways, yes, you can.

                A bunch of football players getting drunk, getting in fights or otherwise acting rowdy? No, I'm not going to blame their parents. Gang-raping and pissing on a girl, yeah, that says something about their upbringing.

                •  And that they did not take responsibility... (2+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  expatjourno, home solar

                  for their actions.  That is also saying something about their upbringing.  Apparently the adults in this are not compelling them to take responsibility for their actions.

                  I didn't watch the video and skimmed over the messages.  I resisted reading any of this for a few days because I knew it would disturb me.

                  My son was raised well. I'm sure he also has done things I would not be proud of too.  However, he was raised to take responsibility for his own actions and to take whatever punishment is appropriate for said actions.

                  He would never be involved in such a thing.  I raised him better than that.  I also raised my children that their actions have consequences.I always made the punishment suitable to the "crime". I also would increase the punishment if they lied or otherwise tried to slime out of responsibility.

                  These boys know this is not appropriate behavior. If they don't then it is the failing of all the adults who they look up to.  Additionally, any adult who would condone such actions should be punished as well.  Isn't it about time we have a society that at the very least respects human dignity? Women are still treated like second class citizens.

      •  Video games are not to blame (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:

        I can think of one game I'm aware of - ONE - that had rape in it.  It was an infamous "hentai" dating sim game from Japan called Tokimeki Check-in.  (Dating sims are like choose your own adventures, only for adults.) If the player chose the option to "rape Ayumi" - he lost the game and his character went to jail.   (The other option was "don't rape Ayumi" - the correct choice, duh - which allowed the player to continue the game as normal.)

        It sparked a lot of outrage in the international video game community that such a scenario was even included in a dating simulation, even a hentai ("pervert") one.

        Atheletes generally don't play video games any more violent than football sims or war games like Halo or Call of Duty.

        The Cake is a lie. In Pie there is Truth. ~ Fordmandalay

        by catwho on Fri Jan 04, 2013 at 01:26:10 PM PST

        [ Parent ]

        •  We'll never know, will we? I'm appalled at the (0+ / 0-)

          violence in many video games and if we are willing to make an argument that talk radio can make people do crazy things, then it must be true that violent games and movies can also make people do crazy things.  We have to look at all the issues, not just pick one (parents) out of thin air.  

    •  enough with the parent bashing (4+ / 0-)

      all thru this thread people are blaming the parents. Do you know the parents and how they raised their kids?

      I say this because we have friends whose son was involved in a very high profile brutal murder.  The parents are some of the most empathetic, kind, gentle and generous human beings I have ever met.  Their daughters are similar in termperment to the parents.  However, even as a very small child, the son was always a little off and hot headed.  His parents spent a great deal of time in therapy with him.  Once he became a teen, the personality disorders magnified.  He chose thugs for friends and self medicated with drugs and alcohol.

      Anyway, when I hear all the parent bashing it makes me think of them.  Parents are not always to blame for their childrens horrible behavior.

      •  Sure. But your friends' son is mentally ill. (0+ / 0-)

        That does not seem to be the case with these thugs.

        •  I would call him (5+ / 0-)

          a classic self centered bully and not mentally ill.  Of course, that is subjective and mental illness falls along a spectrum.  He was a very athletic, smart and handsome kid, very alpha.    Even when the kids were little he was just kind of mean and lacking in empathy.  

 is too easy to blame parents for the faults of stupid teen behavior.  My point is...we really don't know anything about the parents.  They may be asshole parents but they may not be.   Once your kids start going to school their peers and culture are a huge influence.  Genetics also play a role.  

      •  To add to this (4+ / 0-)

        One of my best friends worked with youth, at risk teenagers. I worked with him. His father left when he was young, but his mother was hard working, loving and sweet. We spent Sundays together. Me and that guy watched basketball games together, worked together, played sports and games together. We discussed serious social problems. His mother would make food, struggled hard to make ends meet and was a respected member of the community.

        Her son raped several girls, impregnated one several times and later murdered the same girl after she found him with his new, underage girlfriend. He is now on death row.

        Sometimes people just do terrible, terrible things.

        by DAISHI on Fri Jan 04, 2013 at 09:16:42 AM PST

        [ Parent ]

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