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View Diary: Yesterday, I felt worthless & humiliated (174 comments)

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  •  I waited three months to get in to (12+ / 0-)

    see the eye specialist at Long Beach Comprehensive.  I have no money and no insurance.  The doctor began giving me the normal eye exam as if she was going to prescribe glasses, however, no matter what strength she put the focal machine at, I couldn't read the letters on the sign.  At that point, I was rambling constantly about how my vision had been deteriorating constantly for some time.  She told me to try harder to read the letters.  I tried, I couldn't, I suggested maybe there was something WRONG with my eyes, and that was why I had waited so long for the appointment.  She told me, try to read the letters harder, and that I was the last patient of the day for her, so she was anxious to go home.

    I pointed out to her then, "I understand that beggars can't be choosers, but please try to understand how long I waited to get in to this appointment.  I'm not complaining about my vision.  I'm worried about my eyes.  

    At that point she became a bit ticked off and wasn't too polite to let it show through.  She removed the machine, examined my right eye again with a pen light, then said that she could find nothing wrong with it, and asked me to use the machine to read it the best I could.  She gave me new eyeglass prescriptions and told me that if they didn't work, I could come back and get the prescription corrected.

    Well, I got the prescription corrected, and I couldn't see through them.  In fact, they weren't as good as my previous glasses, because the good eye's prescription had been muffed.  

    Needless to say, I didn't avail myself of the opportunity to get back in line to see this asshole doctor.

    Fast forward about three years.  I go to Sears for their eyeglass special deal, and the Sears guy looks in my eyes and tells me that 1) I have cataracts in both eyes and 2) the cataract in my left one is what they call "orange and ripe," an expression meaning that it's a big, old one, the kind that are very amenable to correction through surgery because they are so obvious.

    Well, as many people here know, I've been blogging half blind for years on DailyKos and bitching about it.  It's still a tough world for the destitute, and Obamacare hasn't yet reached people like us, nor does it seem it was ever designed to.  I'd rather be blind, though, than go back to that asshole doctor.  Even if she could see the cataract now, do you think I would trust her to remove it?  

    I'm sure there are other options for those ready to work the system, but I'm worn out by the system, which seems designed to make it so hard to keep the undeserving from getting any help that even the most needy are treated like ungrateful beggars and thieves.

    •  I'm sorry. (6+ / 0-)
      I'm worried about my eyes.  

      "Til you're so fucking crazy you can't follow their rules" John Lennon - Working Class Hero

      by Horace Boothroyd III on Thu Apr 11, 2013 at 05:19:31 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  Could you post this comment as a diary? (5+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Dumbo, MRA NY, Avilyn, GAladybug, LoreleiHI

      The appalling medical neglect those of us that are dependent on medicaid is another Reagan Zombie we need to fix.

      Lol Reagan Zombie, we can do a whole series of post on the walking dead federal agencies Reagan left us after 20 years of cuts.

      "Til you're so fucking crazy you can't follow their rules" John Lennon - Working Class Hero

      by Horace Boothroyd III on Thu Apr 11, 2013 at 05:42:34 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  No, because I'm embarrassed by this shit. (6+ / 0-)

        And when I've mentioned it before, in the context of the ACA, I got hammered for being lazy about exploiting other resources.

        My bigger point wasn't even about me, above, but about the degrading aspect of the system, and I worry very much that it's where Medicare and SS are heading with the means-testing idea.  

        Means-testing sounds SO GOOD on the surface -- making sure that the people who need the services most get them, and saving money by not offering them to the better off.  However, no sane person with insurance would ever willingly tolerate shit like what I described, much less be willing to have your eyes cut open by such a doctor.  

        "I can't see anything anymore, doctor!"  

        "Well, you were the last patient of the day.  Give it a few weeks and maybe you'll get used to it, then make another appointment.  NEXT!"

        Means-testing probably does save money, but it establishes a beggar relationship, which must please the Republicans, who would like people to dread and despair about being in the grip of any government service.

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