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View Diary: * New Day * — What's your biggest fear? Mine was Kossack-phobia. Are you afraid of Markos? (258 comments)

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  •  About 7 years ago my chiropractor saw a mole (3+ / 0-)

    on my back, didn't like the looks of it, and told me to get it checked out.  I did.

    I saw a Physician's Assistant to a dermatologist who, in this sickeningly blase way, said, "Oh, that's what we call a melanoma in situ. We may call you back after the biopsy to have more cut out."  And then sent me home for two weeks-- two weeks-- to await the results. Mind you, I've known several people die from melanomas.

    This thing was on my upper back, over my heart and lungs. I was really, really scared. Wake up sweating in the middle of the night scared. Wake up heart-pounding scared. I even made a playlist of songs about how scared I was (Six Feet Under provided a lot of my songs).  Did my best to put it out of my mind.

    Well, it turned out to be totally benign. I talked to the PA and suggested to him that using the M-word with a blonde with a history of severe sunburns maybe wasn't his best move. I told him that if I'd also happened to have an anxiety disorder I would have been a major basket case.

    He said, "I think it's important to tell my patients what I'm thinking."

    I tell you what-- I don't want to know what my doctor is thinking. My patients do NOT want to know what I am thinking. Your doctor's job is to think the worst for you and not scare the living fuck out of you while they're doing it. I found another dermatologist. I asked him the screening question: "If I came in to see you with a suspicious mole on my back, and you thought it might be melanoma, what would you say to me?" and he gave me a funny look and replied, "Well, since you're concerned about that mole why don't we just biopsy it and send it off? I'll talk to you as soon as I get the results."  There ya go.

    So, this is my long-winded way of telling you, I get how scared you are. There's just no way around it. Keep enjoying your life in the now, and let the future take care of itself. There's nothing more you can do right now.

    Oh, I used to be disgusted
    Now I try to be amused
    ~~ Elvis Costello

    by smileycreek on Sat May 11, 2013 at 01:57:03 PM PDT

    [ Parent ]

    •  HMO (3+ / 0-)

      We have an HMO and am not even sure if my primary care physician even knows about any of this, since it wasn't him or his nurse that called.
      It was the HMO's main office calling me about radiology finding it and then setting up the next appointments - there are 2 different appointments and that's why it was so hard to try to reschedule.
      Dealing with the appointment makers or whatever they're called is never easy and they're not exactly compassionate people.

      It wouldn't even matter if my primary care physician knew, because he's new.
      My old primary care doc retired but that's typical for our HMO.
      I've never had the same doctor for over 3 years - they either retire or move on.

      I've never been happy with our healthcare provider when it comes to primary care, but what choice did/do we have?
      Sadly, it's the only thing provided by our former employer although I do think we could go outside the plan but during a certain time.
      And the real bummer is that our HMO is rated one of the best in our area and believe me, that's not saying much.

      When my husband was sick 10 years ago, those people were exceptional, and also part of the HMO but they were the specialists.

      I've had a love/hate relationship with them for 27 years.

      I am really trying to buck-up and hang in there!
      LOL

      All we need is LOVE!

      by arizonablue on Sat May 11, 2013 at 05:40:16 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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