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  •  One of the problems with being a rock (20+ / 0-)

    is that you haven't needed to ask for help, and you're not going to be very good at it to start with - been there. I never did learn it very well, and I tend to give up if I don't get a fairly fast positive response.

    But - go looking for other rocks, first. Most of the people you're close to are probably accustomed to letting you be the strong one. Go outside your circle. If  you have a pastor, try there - get his or her recommendations for people who are good at support.

    And, what worked somewhat for me was massive doses of b-12 to compensate for the increased stress. It can make a big difference.

    Try a doctor's appointment, and ask for a check on your iron levels, and whatever other factors could be contributing to the depression. I'm not suggesting medication - much the contrary - but supplements might make a difference in your overall physical condition.

     

    At least half the future I've been expecting hasn't gotten here yet. Sigh.... (Yes, there's gender bias in my name; no, I wasn't thinking about it when I signed up. My apologies.)

    by serendipityisabitch on Fri May 10, 2013 at 01:05:22 PM PDT

    •  interesting. I was just thinking about anemia (5+ / 0-)

      because if you have it and are exhausted it's hard to determine that it's your anemia and not just the stress of your life actually taking the toll. I recently went to the doctor for something else and found out that the reason I couldn't get off the couch was that I needed three blood transfusions to even get near to a healthy hemoglobin and wasn't getting enough oxygen. I had simply been chalking it up to getting older and having a lot of things going on. Too tired to realize I was sick.

      and to the diarist, I am adding this comment here because I had just now thought of this for you too- take vitamins and iron and see a doctor if you can.
      In fact that is where you ought to be able to get relief advice about other care-givers who could give you a break, or a group where care-givers can vent.

    •  Iron levels? I never heard that one before. (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      viral, The Marti, serendipityisabitch

      "When people spin this in partisan terms to obfuscate the truth, it does a real disservice to normal people not in the big club in DC. Many of them will be hurting...That is why I write."--priceman

      by SouthernLiberalinMD on Sat May 11, 2013 at 11:45:51 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  Yes - I was searching for the general topic (3+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        viral, SouthernLiberalinMD, The Marti

        'fatigue' a couple of months ago and it was one of the things that came up. Anything that hinders the oxygen carrying ability of blood seems to be a potential culprit, though there isn't much precise research. Two of the simplest things to check are iron and b-12 - especially if you're older and/or under stress.

        At least half the future I've been expecting hasn't gotten here yet. Sigh.... (Yes, there's gender bias in my name; no, I wasn't thinking about it when I signed up. My apologies.)

        by serendipityisabitch on Sat May 11, 2013 at 11:55:49 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Thanks--I'll have that checked out (2+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          The Marti, serendipityisabitch

          though I've already had a lot of blood work, by two different docs at different times. Vitamin D levels tend to be low. Some of the amino acids people get from meat also are often low, like purine.  Don't know about iron.

          "When people spin this in partisan terms to obfuscate the truth, it does a real disservice to normal people not in the big club in DC. Many of them will be hurting...That is why I write."--priceman

          by SouthernLiberalinMD on Sat May 11, 2013 at 12:21:44 PM PDT

          [ Parent ]

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