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View Diary: What Does Being Gay In America Mean? (72 comments)

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  •  As I think fairly often, what Gay Community? (15+ / 0-)

    I was supposed to be in the parade yesterday, but my modem died at 8:30 AM, and you know how our priorities are these days. Frankly, I don't think I've been to a parade since probably 2005, and we stopped going every year in I think 1986.

    After careful consideration, I'm convinced there is no such thing as a "Gay Community." There are gay communitIES, of course, and the great challenge is finding the one(s) that fit you best. No, of COURSE we mirror the general population in income distribution. The fault is with the people who write and authorize programming to the mass market, and we're just as susceptible to the messages as anyone else is.

    I'm glad you finally published this!

    -7.75, -8.10; . . . Columbine, Tucson, Aurora, Sandy Hook, Boston (h/t Charles Pierce)

    by Dave in Northridge on Mon Jun 10, 2013 at 02:15:26 PM PDT

    •  Thanks, Dave. (9+ / 0-)

      It was a valiant effort that cost me 2 1/2 hours of sleep last night. I'm glad a few people found it worth their time.

      What can I say? I tried. Talk to you later.

    •  Absolutely. The notion that there's such a (3+ / 0-)

      thing as a coherent "gay community" doesn't make any more sociological sense than having a coherent "straight community". "Community" means a lot more than "a set of people who all share a common trait" (pigeonhole is a better term for that sort of thing, or maybe Kurt Vonnegut's granfalloon). To believe otherwise is to indulge in outgroup homogeneity bias (which one is susceptible to even when one's actually a member of the outgroup in question).

      Sometimes truth is spoken from privilege and falsehood is spoken to power. Good intentions aren't enough.

      by ebohlman on Mon Jun 10, 2013 at 08:03:41 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  "gay community" or "lgbt community" (3+ / 0-)

      is a helpful fiction, a metaphor. It is aspirational, a thing to strive for. Even once we get all those items on the wish list - discrimination outlawed, different families celebrated, etc. - lgbt people will have commonalities that separate us from het culture; whether or how much these commonalities lead us into coalition, it's hard to say. This is an ongoing creation.

      Community is something we have to create. It's not given to us.

      I go to the pride parade every year because I want to be surrounded gay people for one day out of 365.

      My partner and I married while it was legal in California back in 2008. We have gay friends, we have gay coworkers (I do, anyway), we have gay relatives (his nephew, my cousin), we live in a gay friendly area (Berkeley), but we don't spend much time in a gay milieu. I try to support gay institutions - museums, publishers, activist organizations, community centers. If I find myself living alone again I know I will need them in a way I don't quite now.

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