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  •  My partner and I tried to get me pregnant for (32+ / 0-)

    nearly two years.  About 8 months in to the process, I missed a period.  I didn't want to get my hopes up too high and deliberately did not do a pregnancy test.  My body began changing-- breasts getting bigger.  I thought it might be that my missed period meant something.... and then I had what I am sure was a miscarriage.  Horrible, severe cramping, angry bleeding that felt and looked as though it were a hemorrhage, and lots of tissue.  The big clots and clumps of tissue were not what my normal period looked like.  I cried, and called the doctor, and it was one of the worst days of my life.  But life went on, and over a year later I got pregnant with what turned out to be a healthy boy (yay!).  Nonetheless, as my doctor pointed out, as I had not done a pregnancy test, we can not be sure that it was a miscarriage.

    I think back to how it felt and what it was like that day, and the thought of having to save that blood and that tissue-- that pulpy mass that represented my fear and confusion and the loss of our hopes-- so as to prove something to examination by police, is obscene.  The thought of having had to deal with a sheriff or a state medical examiner who would be assuming that I had done something wrong to make what might have been my baby leave my body--- I can't even imagine how anyone can vote for a woman to have to go through that.  

    That legislation is some sick shit.

    That's one more thing to add to my long list of small problems. --my son, age 10

    by concernedamerican on Thu Jun 13, 2013 at 04:38:23 AM PDT

    •  Enforcement???? (21+ / 0-)

      I'm wondering how the H the state intends to enforce the show-us-your-menstrual-pads rule. Griswold v Connecticut (1967 I think) struck down a ban on married couples using birth control because, the Court said, enforcing it would require a cop under the marital bed. This seems to me to require a cop in every bathroom.

      My guess is that absolutely no one would comply -- but that the state would only go after people who were otherwise on the cops' radar. It's a well-known totalitarian measure -- make sure everyone is always violating some rule or other, so that at any moment you can arrest the people you want to arrest and there is always a rationale for it.

    •  When I miscarried at 8-9 weeks (20+ / 0-)

      I. Bled. BUCKETS.

      All over town, since I first tried to get a u/s at my old OB's office, and found out before I went in that he was no longer on our insurance.

      Then in the grocery store restroom we had to stop in on the way across town to see an ob that was on our insurance and could see us that day. we had to stop because I couldn't bear the pressure on my abdomen.

      Then in the waiting room waiting for the trans-vag ultrasound to see what was going on.

      Then after the OB sent us back home and told us, "We're sorry. All you can do is wait it out," I bled more buckets in the ER we had to stop in because my blood pressure took a swan dive.

      I passed clots that felt like watermelons. Flush after flush, I filled up toilets with blood. One sympathetic ER nurse realized I was in there and asked me not to flush. This woman, this stranger to me, then got down on her knees and with rubber-gloved hands, sifted through the bloody detritus and found something the size of a large apple. She showed me the placenta and said, "Thank God you didn't flush this, honey. We shouldn't have to do a D&C because your body and nature took care of it."

      Even though my heart was breaking, that ended up as a comfort to me--at least my body knew how to let go a pregnancy that was never meant to be.

      This woman stripped off her bloody gloves and held me when I cried on that bathroom floor. Maybe 15 years older than me at the time, she told me she had been through it, too.

      She helped me grieve, she provided valuable medical advice, and she gave me emotional support in the middle of a nightmare where I was already starting to go over every single thing I'd done. I'd had wine early on before I knew I was pregnant, I'd been eating a lot of red meat--we were renovating the house and I'd been painting, were there fumes I inhaled?

      And some asshat wants to replace that with a fucking cop and treat me like a goddamn criminal? To him, I say, may the women in your life manifest every terrifying thing about them that motivates him to attempt to make laws like this. May the women he fear, give him something to be afraid of.

      How does the Republican Congress sit down with all the butthurt over taxing the wealthy?

      by athenap on Thu Jun 13, 2013 at 08:26:09 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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