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View Diary: Philly Case Workers Fired for Placing a Black Child With a White Couple (24 comments)

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  •  Hmmmm.... (21+ / 0-)
    Angela's home apparently received glowing reviews from WCA, but after a DHS supervisor visited the home, the problems started.  The supervisor asked her how she plans on raising a black man.  Her answer, "the same way I would a white man", apparently did not go over well.
    How else could she have answered that question?

    If she says she wouldn't treat the child any different from how she would raise a white child, she's basically being black-balled for being culturally insensitive. If she had said she would treat him differently based on cultural differences, she's admitting to a bias in how she looks at responds to children of different races.

    That seems like a no-win situation no matter how she answered given the alleged attitude of the supervisor in the case.

    •  I think that supervisor had the agenda, and (6+ / 0-)

      got what he/she wanted.

      Ayn is the bane! Take the Antidote To Ayn Rand and call your doctor in the morning: You have health insurance now! @floydbluealdus1

      by Floyd Blue on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 09:51:49 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  It's not that easy (0+ / 0-)

      Yes, the adoptive parents need to recognize they may need to do some things differently with a child of a different race. If the discussion was as abrupt as the story seems, the DHS worker was out of line for not allowing the prospective mom to elaborate on that issue. However, if the opportunity was given, and the prospective mom stuck with the clueless answer, and no more than that, then doubts about suitability were appropriate.

      “Texas is a so-called red state, but you’ve got 10 million Democrats here in Texas. And …, there are a whole lot of people here in Texas who need us, and who need us to fight for them.” President Obama

      by Catte Nappe on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 10:26:15 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

      •  What should they do differently? (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        happymisanthropy
        •  A variety of things (1+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          ExpatGirl

          A few examples.
          Being mindful that their lives include role models that "look like" the child, which could mean choosing an integrated neighborhood, finding and including black friends in their social circles, attending festivals or entertainment events that highlight AA culture, etc. There's a diary on the rec list right now about white privilege, and how children of color are taught particular attitudes and behaviors in contacts with law enforcment. Black parents know about that already, white parents have to come to know.

          “Texas is a so-called red state, but you’ve got 10 million Democrats here in Texas. And …, there are a whole lot of people here in Texas who need us, and who need us to fight for them.” President Obama

          by Catte Nappe on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 11:42:23 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

          •  That's not raising a child 'differently' (5+ / 0-)

            to a white child.

            I am a white mother to five black males ranging in age from 13 to 26. I considered everything you mention to be normal PARENTING.

            Whites in my position learn fast enough the that world is a different place for other races.

            The original question was offensive and combative. I'm quite sure that the hopeful mother meant that she would love that child with all her heart and do the best for him that she possibly could.

            •  You consider it normal parenting (1+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              ExpatGirl

              And more power to you. We don't know what the potential adoptive mom thinks, though. We know only one question she was asked, and one brief response she made. If that alone is all there was, then she might not have learned fast enough that the world is different for other races. On the other hand, there might have been considerably more back and forth between the worker and the mother that could have illuminated the thinking of either side. If so, we don't know what it included.

              “Texas is a so-called red state, but you’ve got 10 million Democrats here in Texas. And …, there are a whole lot of people here in Texas who need us, and who need us to fight for them.” President Obama

              by Catte Nappe on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 01:05:36 PM PDT

              [ Parent ]

              •  You've got a point (4+ / 0-)
                Recommended by:
                Catte Nappe, myboo, asym, Cassandra Waites

                and after I hit send I realized that I knew absolutely nothing about the potential parent in question. I made and assumption and ran with it.

                It took a lot of effort to make sure my children had regular exposure to strong black male role models. It was all the more difficult because we were in South Africa and the legacy of Apartheid is still strong in the Cape Town townships. I wanted my children to understand that the life of desperation they had viewed as normal, wasn't, it was engineered. It took a long time for some of my older children to transition their thinking from a 'survival' POV to a 'building for the life I want' POV.

                There aren't nearly enough movies or TV shows with strong black male role models or strong black family units. Making sure your child isn't constantly bombarded by ugly racial stereotypes in entertainment often means taking the time to watch things before they do. I was constantly vigilant about anything that I felt carried subtly degrading messages. I don't enjoy the townships (not safe!) but spent time their anyway to keep the connection strong. I support traditional coming of age practices (even though I hate them, if you know what I mean). Picking subjects for school projects can be a much longer process when the goal is also to build on pride in being black. I asked non-white male employees I admired to spend time mentoring and answering questions. The list goes on.

                I was wrong in my original statement. There is a lot a parent of white children gets to take for granted. Thanks for coming back to me on it.

                •  erg. "spent time THERE" (0+ / 0-)
                •  Very graciously stated rethinking (3+ / 0-)
                  Recommended by:
                  ExpatGirl, asym, Cassandra Waites

                  And it seems you did, in fact, have to do some things very differently to be the best parent you could for your children. To some degree every parent probably does go places and do things that wouldn't be their choice as they nurture a childs interest in sports or music or dance or science or..... But it does seem to me that it's got to be more consciously intentional for a parent raising a child from a different race and/or culture.

                  “Texas is a so-called red state, but you’ve got 10 million Democrats here in Texas. And …, there are a whole lot of people here in Texas who need us, and who need us to fight for them.” President Obama

                  by Catte Nappe on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 01:51:14 PM PDT

                  [ Parent ]

          •  ALL children should also be exposed to (3+ / 0-)

            people of color as role models, should participate in integrated communities, and should attend events that highlight other cultures.

            w/re law enforcement contacts, again I think it would be instructive for ALL children to learn about racial bias/animus in the law enforcement community, and more generally throughout our culture.

            In other words, saying "the same way I would a white man" may well be a completely appropriate response, assuming the parent would raise a white child in a culturally-aware, loving and nuturing home.

            •  It's a fine ideal (1+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              ExpatGirl

              But the assummption can't be made that the parent being screened would take that approach, unless she were to explain her response accordingly.

              “Texas is a so-called red state, but you’ve got 10 million Democrats here in Texas. And …, there are a whole lot of people here in Texas who need us, and who need us to fight for them.” President Obama

              by Catte Nappe on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 01:01:55 PM PDT

              [ Parent ]

      •  Is the answer so clueless? By saying she would do (5+ / 0-)

        it the same, wouldn't teaching a child about their cultural heritage fall under the umbrella of normal parenting?

        "Don't Bet Against Us" - President Barack Obama

        by MRA NY on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 10:46:47 AM PDT

        [ Parent ]

        •  Not necessarily (0+ / 0-)

          In some respects teaching about one's own cultural heritage comes naturally, through family traditions, conversations with extended family, involvement in one's community, etc. Teaching about another culture first requires that one knows there is going to have to be some additional effort, admitting one needs to learn some things about that culture oneself, and having a more intentional strategy for teaching the child.

          “Texas is a so-called red state, but you’ve got 10 million Democrats here in Texas. And …, there are a whole lot of people here in Texas who need us, and who need us to fight for them.” President Obama

          by Catte Nappe on Tue Jul 02, 2013 at 11:47:35 AM PDT

          [ Parent ]

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