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View Diary: Why Scientists Don't Understand Anything about Sexual Orientation (214 comments)

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  •  Ack! Stop reading my novels! (4+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    GreenMother, wader, JosephK74, sturunner

    Just kidding.

    Seriously though, the problem with most polygamous cultures seems to be that they are based not off consenting, sexually fluid adults, but rather male power and property.

    NOT sexy whatsoever to my way of thinking.

    I don't blame Christians. I blame Stupid. Which sadly is a much more popular religion these days.

    by detroitmechworks on Mon Jul 08, 2013 at 12:39:08 PM PDT

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    •  Exactly. (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      detroitmechworks, Cali Scribe

      Breeding your own workforce via multiple wives.

      Or is it just me?

      •  No, that does seem to be the trend. (4+ / 0-)

        Course, I did live a multiple relationship for a while.  Didn't work out too well in the end, but that had to do more with lack of honesty then anything else.

        I have no doubt that a multiple, bisexual, group marriage can work, but it requires very special/honest/open people.

        I don't blame Christians. I blame Stupid. Which sadly is a much more popular religion these days.

        by detroitmechworks on Mon Jul 08, 2013 at 12:50:41 PM PDT

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        •  The concept of "possessing" another person (3+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          detroitmechworks, GreenMother, wader

          aka "jealousy" would definitely have to be dealt with. Whether that's societal or inborn is probably fodder for an article or diary beyond the concept of this site. Even in  novels that have tackled the issue of group marriage/living arrangements, the males tend to have their own "primary" partners -- and the higher the male is in the hierarchy, the more "primary" partners they have that are off-limits to the rank and file.

          There's only one rule that I know of, babies -- goddammit, you've got to be kind. -- Kurt Vonnegut

          by Cali Scribe on Mon Jul 08, 2013 at 01:00:55 PM PDT

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          •  Fear of loss is very real. (1+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            GreenMother

            I tend to find that jealousy is deeply rooted in the fear of loss, IMHO.

            The idea that if somebody is getting something that you aren't you somehow are being robbed.

            In my opinion, and this is STRICTLY my opinion, it's understandable but fairly ridiculous.  It's a little immature, to be obsessed with the idea that somebody being happy somehow diminishes your own happiness.

            Concerns about disease, pregnancy, etc, are understandable.  An orgasm?  Not so much.

            I don't blame Christians. I blame Stupid. Which sadly is a much more popular religion these days.

            by detroitmechworks on Mon Jul 08, 2013 at 01:10:18 PM PDT

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            •  I haven't quite made up my mind how much (1+ / 0-)
              Recommended by:
              detroitmechworks

              jealousy is hardwired and how much of it is learned.

              I have no direct experience in a poly relationship, so any commentary on that would be at best, second hand.

              •  Well, from my experience... (0+ / 0-)

                in a poly relationship, as long as there was honest communication and agreement, jealousy was minimized, if not completely eliminated.  (As far as physiological and emotional state goes, IMHO)

                Of course, when dishonesty began... well, that's what resulted in those feelings coming on VERY strongly.  

                It's one of the reasons I  tie jealousy to fear.  I think they're very deeply connected, but that's just my personal opinion.

                I don't blame Christians. I blame Stupid. Which sadly is a much more popular religion these days.

                by detroitmechworks on Mon Jul 08, 2013 at 03:55:45 PM PDT

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        •  I don't classify polyamory with the other (1+ / 0-)
          Recommended by:
          detroitmechworks

          For now--Women are free to choose their partners.

          In those other situations, not so much.

          •  Well, those other situations are not about love. (1+ / 0-)
            Recommended by:
            GreenMother

            They're about power.  The idea of women as property which permeates many of those cultures is rather disturbing to me personally.

            But heck, I'm just a romantic pornographer...  ;)

            I don't blame Christians. I blame Stupid. Which sadly is a much more popular religion these days.

            by detroitmechworks on Mon Jul 08, 2013 at 01:07:16 PM PDT

            [ Parent ]

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