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View Diary: Saturday nutpick-a-palooza: Nice civil war you have going there! (254 comments)

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  •  I meant embarrassed in the "not conscious of it" (4+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    Dirtandiron, AmazingBlaise, MLP, mmacdDE


    No, they're not consciously embarrassed.  You're right about that.  That's the thing about denial.  If you were conscious of the thing you're in denial about, it wouldn't be denial.  Yet ... it's still in there, and deep-down they know it ...  

    ... because ... by the same token, you can only be in denial about something that you know deep-down is true.  You can't be in denial about something you honestly don't know.  ("What's the capital of New Zealand?"  "I don't know."  "You're in denial!!")

    That's the paradox of shame/low-self-esteem and monumental conceit:  It is the people who deep-down feel like the lowest of the low who appear to have the greatest, most overblown self-esteem.  They are the ones who are never wrong, never make any mistakes, and who aren't responsible for anything.  

    They are the ones who never have to apologize.  They would rather hammer nails into their own head than admit a mistake or apologize.

    (I'm writing this from my experience counseling domestic violence abusers ... and I've often here noted the parallels between them and the modern GOP.)

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