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View Diary: The Tampa Bay Times reveals Bill Young's shocking flaw, and his would-be successors reveal theirs (84 comments)

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  •  As someone who's been both, let me say (11+ / 0-)

    That yes, there's a difference, especially when the new edition is much younger.  There's a sting to being traded in for someone half your age that simply isn't there when the new lover is your contemporary.

    Worst of all is when the new lover/wife basically makes it impossible to have anything approaching a civil relationship with one's ex.  My former husband and I weren't on great terms when we divorced, but at least we were able to speak/e-mail each other occasionally.  I was also able to maintain a relationship with his family, whom I adored and who adored me.  All that ended when he remarried, as his second wife basically slandered me, forced him and his relatives to cut off all contact, and was responsible for a million petty and not so petty harassments, one of which nearly resulted in me bringing legal action.

    The end result?  Ten years ago, Wingding and I were able to meet in Boston for a nice dinner and a very cordial conversation during the World Science Fiction Convention.  Our marriage was over but we were handling the situation like adults, and there was enough of our old friendship left that we hugged as we said good-bye in Copley Square.  Today I actively avoid not only the town they live in (fifteen miles north of me, and also home to shops and restaurants I don't dare go near for fear of them noticing me) but websites he frequents, and even the churches we both attend (same denomination, his now employs my old minister).

    Maybe we would have ended up hating each other if he hadn't remarried, but after seeing what I've seen over the last ten years, I'm convinced that the reason we went from friendly exes to hating each other's guts can be laid primarily at her door.  And given this?  In all seriousness, it's almost better to be cheated upon than deal with this nonsense.

    YMMV, of course....

    This isn't freedom. This is fear - Captain America

    by Ellid on Wed Jan 08, 2014 at 07:32:36 AM PST

    [ Parent ]

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