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View Diary: Cheers and Jeers: Wednesday (122 comments)

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  •  Or, (6+ / 0-)

    one person who is certain that they are the one who remembers everything perfectly and one person who admits that memory is a funny thing.

    When lots of people show up to vote, Democrats tend to win.

    by Audri on Wed Feb 05, 2014 at 06:37:48 AM PST

    [ Parent ]

    •  Guess who loses? (7+ / 0-)

      Well, in arguments, EVERYBODY LOSES, no matter who is correct.

      When lots of people show up to vote, Democrats tend to win.

      by Audri on Wed Feb 05, 2014 at 06:39:37 AM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  Absolutely! Growing up in that argumentative (7+ / 0-)

        family gave me the perspective to see how that kind of "take no prisoners, win-at-all-costs" tactic was really, really hurtful and toxic.  When every argument has to have a WINNER, the result is a death-battle to NOT be the LOSER.  

        Thankfully, I have had some training in "active listening" to de-program some of my childhood lessons.  I try to avoid the kind of thinking where I might slip into that winner/loser, black/white dichotomy now.  

        Really, the goal of any communication should be clarity and understanding, not winning or losing.  When both parties come away feeling heard and respected, they BOTH "win."

        That's hard, though.  Good luck with Mr. A.  You might have to wait and give him space and time to realize he doesn't have to make YOU LOSE in order for him to "win."  That is really hard for some people, though.  Hoo-boy.  Sorry this is the hand you've been dealt today.  (((Audri)))  

        Somebody told me that you had a boyfriend who looked a girlfriend that I had in February of last year.

        by koosah on Wed Feb 05, 2014 at 06:53:22 AM PST

        [ Parent ]

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