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View Diary: Monday Night Cancer Club: Did You Have Any Idea What You Were Getting Into? (40 comments)

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  •  I said nope. Didn't know anyone with cancer, (9+ / 0-)

    no cancer in my family and really didn't care about cancer.

    But the truth was my brother in law died of lung cancer I just wasn't anywhere near him so wasn't involved.

    And it wasn't till AFTER my surgery that I realized that my mother had died a long and lingering death of leukemia when I was 8. Ha! No cancer in my family.

    But really I never thought of it because leukemia isn't genetic. I probably would have paid more attention to a potential effect on my future if she had died of breast cancer.

    Tracy B Ann - technically that is my signature. If I had Bill Gates money, I'd buy Detroit.

    by ZenTrainer on Mon Mar 31, 2014 at 06:55:19 PM PDT

    •  Isn't that something? (7+ / 0-)

      Makes a difference, though, if you're not an adult, keeping company with someone who is sick.

      For that matter, though, I myself didn't describe here the closest connection I had to someone who had cancer and died of it eventually: my ex-father-in-law.

      My place in the family was pretty precarious by the time he died, eighteen months after diagnosis, but it didn't really start out that way. And I was fairly involved in his late-stage illness (he lived out of town from us, so I wasn't on call till the end), making him food to tempt him to eat and the like. Poor guy. In those 18 months, he and I became pretty close, much closer than we had ever been (and might not have been otherwise, unfortunately). That was a bittersweet aspect, too.

      I have written about his death before in some other diary. In some ways it was cruel; he was only 63 and went down fast--stage IV prostate cancer at diagnosis, already in his bones. But in another way his death itself was amazing. I truly believe he decided that he was ready to go, and so he did. It was hard work, too, but he managed it well. You could practically see the energy peel off of him in waves during his last few hours. He was conscious and lucid till about two hours before he left. When I die, I hope I have a similar composure and grace, to be honest.

      It's been over 20 years now, and he wasn't a blood relative, and I'm no longer in the relationship that connected me to him. I still want to honor his memory.

      Support Small Business: Shop Kos Katalogue If you'd like to join the Motor City Kossacks, send me a Kosmail.

      by peregrine kate on Mon Mar 31, 2014 at 08:01:23 PM PDT

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