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View Diary: It's about time this culture had a serious discussion about PTSD (202 comments)

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  •  You must be a helluva a strong woman to have (17+ / 0-)

    survived all of that including the PTSD after.

    One thing that helped me was to start writing down triggers.

    For a long time I didn't realize that Alarm Clocks were one. Someone mentioned that and I thought--hmmm. No wonder I wake up pissed off and anxious.

    We now have a clock that starts off soft and incrementally gets louder instead of the instant jangle your nerves FYI the world is on fire sound!

    Slowly I was able to recognize my triggers and either avoid them or deal with them.

    Because I was stalked and harassed over years, I understand about the anniversary being amorphous. You can have more than one.

    I suspect for many women, it is like this. It takes years to get to the bottom of them all.

    Glad you survived FloridaSNMOM and are here to share this with us.

    "It were a thousand times better for the land if all Witches, but especially the blessing Witch, might suffer death." qtd by Ehrenreich & English. For Her Own Good, Two Centuries of Expert's Advice to Women pp 40

    by GreenMother on Sun May 25, 2014 at 07:31:29 AM PDT

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    •  I wrote down triggers a long time ago (11+ / 0-)

      the first time I was in therapy, though I've discovered more along the way. I was in therapy twice, once in a private sliding scale fee place, and in a rape crisis/domestic violence shelter later on. The big problem I had the second time was my autistic son setting off some of my attacks. As I couldn't do a whole lot to change his behavior I went back into therapy to get mine under control.

      We once had a car horn turn itself on and get stuck in the middle of the night (it was an OLD car), and it took my other half several hours to get me to go outside, even after the police came and disabled it and told me it was clear. Because my ex isn't a 'get in your face' stalker, he's sneaky, does things that can't be tied directly to him legally, but knows will bug the hell out of me.

      For example, after I left him my folks took me down to Florida for a vacation (to get away from his crap). While we were gone, he broke into my parents house. He didn't take anything or leave any prints, except he left the cellar door wide open and put 'our song' on top of the record player where I'd be sure to see it. Nothing for the cops to legally tie to him, but enough that we knew it was him. My aunt found the house like that. We think he was trying to get us to come home early, but it didn't work.

      "Madness! Total and complete madness! This never would've happened if the humans hadn't started fighting one another!" Londo Mollari

      by FloridaSNMOM on Sun May 25, 2014 at 07:48:45 AM PDT

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    •  Yes!!! (3+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      FloridaSNMOM, CenPhx, GreenMother

      I never realized what some of my triggers were for years. Especially since some of them seem so ridiculously benign. It took a while before my husband believed me when I told him certain things actually triggered me. When I finally discovered some of my triggers, I developed a plan for dealing with them, especially the ones I encounter daily. It was such a relief to finally gain some control over myself.

      Two hundred fifty years of slavery. Ninety years of Jim Crow. Sixty years of separate but equal. Thirty-five years of racist housing policy. Until we reckon with our compounding moral debts, America will never be whole. - Ta-Nehisi Coates

      by moviemeister76 on Sun May 25, 2014 at 07:34:53 PM PDT

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      •  I remember when I had that moment. It was (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        FloridaSNMOM

        profound. When I got out of the service, I didn't realize that I had PTSD. I knew I was afraid of some things, but I didn't realize how deeply into my life this would reach and, how it could just shake me like a pitbull with a chew toy.

        For the longest time I didn't even have the words to describe it. I didn't know what a trigger was at all. I had vague understanding that at certain times of the year I got weird, but no label, no depth of comprehension.

        When you know, it's like being able to break an evil spell. It's almost magical. Suddenly you are there looking at these insignificant things directly and just that act of acknowledgement deprives them of the power they hold over you. Or some of that power.

        It doesn't stop everything but it sure helps.

        "It were a thousand times better for the land if all Witches, but especially the blessing Witch, might suffer death." qtd by Ehrenreich & English. For Her Own Good, Two Centuries of Expert's Advice to Women pp 40

        by GreenMother on Mon May 26, 2014 at 06:34:59 AM PDT

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