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View Diary: Living in a Cage of Man Made Fear (188 comments)

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  •  Thanks, onomastic (11+ / 0-)

    for another great diary.  I really appreciate your thoughtful leadership on this issue.

    It is like a cage - but it is also like a series of pinpricks, one at a time, over and over again.

    Wondering if it's "safe" to wear that top, because I might be "sending a message" or being "too sexy."

    Wondering if that guy who has been following me for two miles and six turns is really following me, or if it's just a coincidence.

    Making sure that my windows all lock and putting pieces of wood or lead pipe in the window  or sliding glass door track, so someone can't force his way in.

    Making sure that every - every place I live has a double-bolt on the door.

    Catching myself sugarcoating negative feedback or being oh so very nice when I have to bring up a tough topic a powerful man (even though they pay me to do this!)

    Hearing a man make the exact same suggestion I just did in a meeting, five minutes later, although it was ignored when I said it.

    Having one of my male friends scoff when I mention not liking crowds, that they tend to step on me (although he apologized when I called him on it).

    Our reality is a painful, painful place sometimes.  I am grateful for the powerful voices here on Kos, and surprised and grateful at the number of male allies that are emerging.

    •  I don't know if you'll see this, LSophia (0+ / 0-)

      The reply is days late and you deserve so much better.

      I wanted to thank you for the story you share in your comment days ago and unfortunately was side tracked.

      The things you shared perfectly illustrate the reality so many of us live with.

      It should never happen and I'm sorry it happened to you.

      Thank you for illuminating the bars that define our lives.

      Hope you are well.

      All the best to you, always

      There is something in us that refuses to be regarded as less than human. We are created for freedom - Archbishop Desmond Tutu

      by Onomastic on Thu Jun 05, 2014 at 08:26:07 AM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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