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View Diary: I'm mad as hell... V3 Thank you (250 comments)

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  •  If it makes you feel any better... (14+ / 0-)

    It's not just the US. The UK is no better.

    There were four fags at my wedding in Feb, two of whom are married to each other. There were actually six but until Jane and Robert out themselves we ain't saying squat diddly in public.

    In a civil ceremony in the UK you're expected to choose readings which you provide in advance for approval. I went to the edge, quoting a Massachussetts Supreme Court decision and writing both an intro and outro to accompany it so that the lawyer and doctor couple who are my close friends could deliver it together.

    There are limitations on what you can and can't read, and those include anything religious or political. It took a full month to get approval. I'd worked hours on writing and editing.

    As we stood there in front of all of our guests (some who had flown across the Atlantic only days before), ready to marry and forced to listen to that stupid woman drone on, she said something that had me almost leap over and strangle her. I mean that quite literally. I was ready to explode and my wife knew it.

    "In England, marriage is a special relationship between a man and a woman." I don't know what the hell she said after that because it took every last bit of concentration not to scream, and I don't mean in the B-Movie sense. More like The Fifth Element.

    Then my friends were asked to come up to read what we managed to get approved:

    In deciding on a reading, couples tend to look toward poetry, plays, or particularly belovéd books or stories with familiar passages. Not even lawyers consider State Supreme Court decisions. Despite Canine's upbringing as the son of a judge, his family and friends all of whom may call themselves "esquire", it still may seem out of place, even if
    his father, BigDog, or his uncle SuperHound were here with us today. Yet the instant he showed BitchGoddess this legal decision, she agreed. A wedding shouldn't be a place for politics and politics has no place in love.

    A little over five years ago, the Massachussetts Supreme Court heard the case of "Goodridge v. Department of Health" and decided that the state may not deny the protections, benefits and obligations conferred by civil marriage to two individuals who wish to marry regardless of their gender. Supreme Court Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall explained in the 50-page decision:

    "Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support; it brings stability to our society. For those who choose to marry, and for their children, marriage provides an abundance of legal, financial, and social benefits. In return it imposes weighty legal, financial, and social obligations...

    "Without question, civil marriage enhances the 'welfare of the community.' It is a 'social institution of the highest importance...'

    "Marriage also bestows enormous private and social advantages on those who choose to marry. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity, and family...'

    "Because it fulfils yearnings for security, safe haven, and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution, and the decision whether AND WHOM to marry is among life's momentous acts of self-definition."

    BitchGoddess and Canine today redefine themselves as one, and both hope that any people who fall in love as they themselves have done should have the same rights and opportunities as they have on this most happy of days.

    I relaxed.

    There wasn't a single protest. On the contrary, almost every single guest commented on the inappropriateness of the Registrar's little soapbox bullshit. You have more support that you realise.

    I have to go back to that town soon. Now that they can't "unmarry" me I can tell that woman exactly what I think. I believe I'll start by asking her what the fuck she's doing in an office when she has kids at home and a husband who needs feeding.

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