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View Diary: Today's NYT: Downplaying A Rape At Harvard (342 comments)

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  •  The worst part of Blade Runner... (3+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    IhateBush, TeresaInPa, Swordsmith

    was the love scene. And that is really too bad because otherwise that movie rocked. I cringe everytime I watch it during that part. But there is a larger cultural question involved... what are guys supposed to do? If a guy asks a girl directly, may I have sex with you? He is unlikely to to have a very high success rate. The emphasis is on the male to initiate sex, many women do feel that it is "slutty" for a woman to make the first move, or to be "too easy".

    I don't think that played much of a role in this case. The guy was probably being an asshole and ended up assaulting the girl. His only defense is that he didn't go all the way, which in no way makes him innocent, just guilty of a lesser crime. It's similar to the difference between shooting someone in the leg or shooting them in the head.

    The woman is a lame ass right wing apologist who has issues with feminism, which is fine in and of itself. But trying to sanitize the criminal actions of her dickhead ex-boyfriend in doing so is not OK. There are legitimate questions to be raised about our criminal justice system and societies attitudes about sexuality, in my opinion. I was personally appalled at the rush to judgement by some with regards to high profile cases (such as the Kobe Bryant and Duke cases) where there was clearly alot of room for doubt. But this guy was pretty clearly out of bounds on the night in question, and it sounds like he got off pretty easy anyway.

    Don't fuck with my ch'i.

    by Han Solo on Sun Jan 14, 2007 at 02:47:12 PM PST

    [ Parent ]

    •  This turns out not to be the case. (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      Swordsmith, neroden

      If a guy asks a girl directly, may I have sex with you? He is unlikely to to have a very high success rate.

      I recall one dweeb who became well know at college.  Every Saturday night he would load up with recods, a bottle of wine, etc. and go through the halls of residence knocking on every door and asking all the women if they would like to.. uhh.  you know...  The rumour says that he never failed to be occupied every Saturday night.  

      I obviously could not check the rumour for accuracy entirely but I checked it enough to confirm that he did "ok" on most nights.

      Best Wishes, Demena

      by Demena on Sun Jan 14, 2007 at 03:48:44 PM PST

      [ Parent ]

    •  I give this a recommend (0+ / 0-)

      for one particular reason.

      The emphasis is on the male to initiate sex, many women do feel that it is "slutty" for a woman to make the first move, or to be "too easy".

      The whole idea that women are called sluts because they enjoy sex or desire to have sex is the main thing that is the driving force for treating women as second class citizens.  Forced pregnancy, STDs, and cervical cancer is "punishment" for not remaining "pure".

      In particular, if you look at the way that right-wingers' view of women, it is that they should be subservient to the men in their lives, and then "save themselves" for their husband.  

      The sooner that this shitty double standard can be eliminated, the better everyone will be.

      The woman is a lame ass right wing apologist who has issues with feminism, which is fine in and of itself.

      I didn't get that sense from the article, rather I got the sense of a woman who was regretful that her desired relationship didn't happen.  I saw little to suggest that she was particularly an anti-feminist right-wing mouthpiece.  

      •  asdf (0+ / 0-)

        this is a day late in the conversation, but my take on the whole article was this:  she went off to be a counselor at summer camp and met a dreamy guy (isn't that why you go to camp??)  She was 19 and fell for him the way 19 yo kids do.  So, still emotionally growing, still figuring out how to have real adult relationships, she made the mistake (i would call it that) of basically ignoring the rape allegations.  Once she did that, it was easy to stay in the relationship.

        but all the while she was getting criticized from every direction.  she stayed with him for 3 years probably as a defensive reation to the criticism and also for fear of what leaving him would do.

        now she's out, she regrets the whole thing, doesn't know how to deal with it and wrote this as a way to express how she felt and why she did what she did.

        i felt less like she was defending him and more like she was defending herself.

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