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  •  Yeah, I've grown up a bit (1+ / 0-)
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    LOTS of therapy - about half my life

    At the same time, my mom did start a school for me...

    A strange person, she is; you are right, she is not capable of being other than she is.  She reminds me a lot of the mother in Ordinary People, with a bit of Felix Unger from the Odd Couple thrown in.

    Statistical consultant - homepage on my user page

    by plf515 on Sun Mar 11, 2007 at 11:17:43 AM PDT

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    •  It makes you wonder..does she sense (1+ / 0-)
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      her own deficiencies?  And if she does, does it make her unhappy?  
      My dad abused his four kids horrendously (and I do mean horrendously) right from the start.  And yet, and yet..there was only one thing he was ever afraid of, and that was tornadoes.  And one day, when he and his grown daughter were caught in a tornado, outside, he threw her down at the base of a tree and covered her with his own body.  
      Hardly anyone is ever wholly dark or wholly light.  We're all these uneasy mixtures of both, always struggling to find..what?  Ascendency of one or the other?  Or at least a balance?

      •  I have no idea (1+ / 0-)
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        one of the things I did to preserve my sanity is, early on, decide that I wasn't really all that interested in her.

        No one is all bad.  But my own defense is to not try to pry into what of her is bad and good, and what she recognizes in herself.  If she were not my mother, she isn't a person I'd like to know.  So I try not to.

        OTOH, she never abused me as your dad did you.  She was simply incapable of giving me what I needed - and not simply because I was learning disabled - she is also incapable with my siblings.  e.g. She has NEVER told ANY of us "I love you"

        Statistical consultant - homepage on my user page

        by plf515 on Sun Mar 11, 2007 at 11:55:47 AM PDT

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    •  Sympathy, plf515 (3+ / 0-)
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      redmcclain, sherlyle, plf515

      I was terrified by Mary Tyler Moore's portrayal of the mother in Ordinary People.  Every insecurity I ever had in life was brought out during the movie.  I cried the entire time.  But to think of adding Felix Unger into the mix is too scary to even contemplate.  

      "Man's life's a vapor Full of woe. He cuts a caper, Down he goes. Down de down de down he goes.

      by JFinNe on Sun Mar 11, 2007 at 11:51:12 AM PDT

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