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View Diary: "The Only Moral Abortion Is My Abortion" (344 comments)

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  •  I disagree with that because (10+ / 0-)

    the man does not undergo the health risks. The man does not suffer the limitations on activity (including loss of pay, loss of promotion, and possibly job loss)that go with being pregnant.  The man does not suffer the pain and/or undergo the serious surgical procedure required to deliver the baby and the man does not experience the permanent changes to the body caused by bringing a child to term. It is not fair, but there is no equality of experience that confers the right to a veto on the father.

    Needless to say, a woman who values her relationship with the father will work her decision out with him. You will say that it's unfair that men have to pay child support when they would have chosen abortion. I agree. The problem is, someone has to provide for the children whether the father wanted them or not.

    It's not fair, just the way it isn't fair that pregnancy and delivery can't be shared. But "sharing" pregnancy and birth between the sexes wasn't an adaptation that had any survival values for mammals over the last 270 million years, so we're stuck. Personally, I would like to have a social mechanism that would allow a father to renounce his rights and provide help to the mother from community resources, but I don't think that's coming anytime soon, since we don't even provide health care for all children.

    There is also the fact that a lot more rapes take place than are ever prosecuted. What would it take for a man to be disqualified from having a vote? Would it require an accusation of rape from the woman or that the man be convicted of rape?

    If not the latter, wouldn't we see women routinely saying they had been raped to get an abortion, just as middle-class girls and women used to find doctors who would say they must get an abortion or risk their mental or physical health? That kind of skirting around the law encourages a climate of corruption and extortion, and leads to abuse of poor women with few options.

    If it required conviction, how could an abortion possibly be carried out during the early, safe weeks? It would be unusual for a case to come to trial in less than a year in many places.

    It needs to be woman's private decision. It can't be any other way.

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