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View Diary: Union Elections are Not Like Our Political Elections. (65 comments)

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  •  Gather around, everybody, we're having a meeting. (8+ / 0-)

    Come here, associates.  Stacey, cut the monkey business, it's meeting time.  All right, first of all, who wants to lead us in the Wal-Mart cheer?  Stacey?  OK.

    Good, good cheerin you guys.  Really showed the Wal-Mart team spirit.

    First off, you guys, remember to keep your zones clean.  Mike, the Regional Manager, he's going to be coming to the store to do 4x4s this month, and we don't know what day that will be.  So you don't want to leave your zone looking messy.  Pam, your zone was very clean yesterday, so good job, Pam.

    Now, the other thing I want to talk to you about today, I've heard that some people around here are talking about unions.  Some of you may have seen that long haired guy last week handing out those pamphlets.  If you see him again, I don't want anybody touching him or telling him he can't be here.  Just come and find  me or one of the other AMs so we can make sure that he doesn't disturb the customers.

    First of all, I want everyone to know, you're not going to get in trouble or be fired for talking about unions.  But there are a few things I wanted to let you know about.

    Like, did you know that unions exst only to take your money?  It's true.  If you join a union, they will garnish your wages, they will take the money you earn every week, to pay to themselves.  Now, you might be thinking that you're going to be paid more, but there's no guarrantee. They might try to get you more pay, but your pay might stay the same.  It might even go down.  There's no guarrantees.

    But the real reason we don't like unions is because they break up the Wal-Mart team.  They want to make it into us vs. them, managers vs. you guys.  Now, you all know about the open door policy. If you guys have a problem, whatever it is, you can always talk to me or one of the AMs.  And if you don't like what we say, you can go right up to Joe's office and talk to him.  And then you can pick up the red phone and talk to Mike.  And if you don't like what Mike says, you can call right down to Bentonville and talk to Bob.  

    Because that's how we like to handle things.  We understand you guys, we used to be right where you are, not like some Berkenstock wearing union guy who might not even take your phone call.  

    So listen, I want you all to know that there's some boxes of pizza in the break room, everyone gets a slice of pizza during their break today.  Also, don't forget, if you're not clocked into the breakroom for the 12 minutes assigned to you by the electronic time system, that's going to be a learning opportunity.

    Now, everybody, let's do one more Wal-Mart cheer!

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