Skip to main content

View Diary: Boys in the Basement (78 comments)

Comment Preferences

  •  Lefty, I'm curious... (2+ / 0-)
    Recommended by:
    RunawayRose, algebrateacher

    What experience have you had, or what have you read, that has resulted in the claim that "many liberals" are helicopter-like in their parenting styles regarding education?

    This claim contradicts my experience in dealing with thousands of parents, and hundreds identifiable as the helicopter-type.

    I'm honestly curious how you come to equate that kind of behavior with liberal"ism."

    Words ought to be a little wild, for they are the assaults of thoughts on the unthinking. -J.M. Keynes

    by elropsych on Sat Feb 21, 2009 at 05:02:11 PM PST

    •  It is my anecdotal experience... (0+ / 0-)

      in a community of white liberal family and friends that many of my peers as parents are very busy spending hours helping their kids with homework, stage managing their after school activities, and targetting the appropriate prestigious college for them to attend.

      But I do have a tendency to love reducing things to very simple (at times overly simplistic perhaps) dualities, which I may have done in this case.  A good point on your part.

      Cooper Zale Los Angeles

      by leftyparent on Sat Feb 21, 2009 at 05:36:30 PM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  Examples of my experience with hel. parents: (2+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        Lynwaz, alizard
        1. Child caught cheating 3 (three) times during her NY state Regents test in history. Needs to pass to graduate, and the girl was a 90+ avg. student. The proctor took her test and sent her to the office. The principal made him give her the test back and set her up in a room by herself to let her finish. She passed. Turned out the mother had already threatened lawsuits against the school for other disciplinary measures taken including taking her cell phone when she was caught texting during a test earlier in the year.
        1. Student caught blatently plagiarizing the work of a student who took the same class the year before. The father offered to make a discreet donation to the school in order to make sure no one but the teacher the student and the administrator ever found out about this momentary lapse of judgment. The student plagiarized again later the same semester in a different class.
        1. Students caught drinking on a school sponsored trip to Europe. Were given a 2 day suspension upon return and a parent sued the school when her child was kept of the National Honor Society because of it. She claimed the school was at fault for not providing appropriate supervision. Even though her daughter found a way off the 2nd floor balcony of her hotel room to bypass the teacher in the hallway.

        My frustration with these incidents, and others, is that they go way beyond helping with homework or providing tutors for college essays. They interrupt the natural ebb and flow of mistake-consequence, leading these children to a very entitled view of the world. It exists only to give them what they want and feel they deserve by virtue of having parents who will step in and make sure every dumb decision gets swept under the rug. Yet, blowhards on the teevee only complain about welfare queens who have too many children and pay for them by stealing from the rich. Those arrows shoot both ways, and the parents I've seen really swoop in and cover their children's tracks have never been the poor or working-class parents. They have always been the middle class to well-above middle class parents who feel they have something to protect by protecting their children from the consequences of their own boneheaded actions. The children don't learn the error of their ways, and the parents worldview is confirmed when they get away with it. On the other side, the poor and immigrant families I have taught generally buy the bill of goods and believe that through hard work and keeping their noses clean and paying their dues when caught in a lie or mistake is the path to success. Those who "know better" bend every rule, make every threat, and throw every dollar to keep their own out of that jeopardy. But they still work very hard to make sure the lower-privilege groups continue to buy into the ideal.

        Whew. I feel better. Some pent up hostility on my part, maybe. A little. Maybe should have been my own diary!

        Words ought to be a little wild, for they are the assaults of thoughts on the unthinking. -J.M. Keynes

        by elropsych on Sat Feb 21, 2009 at 06:09:57 PM PST

        [ Parent ]

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site