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View Diary: Death with Dignity Law Brings No Dignity to Some (272 comments)

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  •  This thread is very timely for me (11+ / 0-)

    My mother was diagnosed with lung cancer last week. I am terrified at what lies ahead in the coming weeks and months. My singular goal is to help her transition peacefully with as little pain as possible. I wish I had more options at my disposal - but I am so grateful that Hospice is available. Should I specifically ask them what their "policy" is on the liberal use of morphine?

    "Earth provides enough to satisfy every man's need, but not every man's greed." - Gandhi

    by DoubleT on Sun May 10, 2009 at 07:24:45 PM PDT

    •  Yes, ask! (6+ / 0-)

      When my mother-in-law was dying of lung cancer ten years ago, my wife arranged with the hospice people to have Enough Pain Meds Dammit. It was no problem, so long as there was somebody around who could do all the forms.

    •  yes, call hospice (2+ / 0-)
      Recommended by:
      DoubleT, BardoOne

      I still remember the utter peace that descended.  I called to ask about possible arrangements and managed to stutter that my dad was dying in another town.  The quiet woman asked me, why do you say that? and I knew I had found a source of comfort

      (unlike pals who made the conversation be about them or told me it couldn't be true or avoided me).

      "You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them." [Ray Bradbury]

      by RosyFinch on Sun May 10, 2009 at 10:08:52 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

    •  Provided there are any 'others' (0+ / 0-)

      the person can locate to speak meaningfully with.

      Always surprising to see how many people seem to think there must be friends or family around.

    •  Yes, ask, but I would also tell them that my (0+ / 0-)

      mother had told me that she really didn't want to suffer. That she didn't care about a few days one way or the other.

      I would be saying that to protect myself -- although if she's still articulate, there's some risk.

      Does she have a living will? If not, there is a fantastic one here:
      http://www.agingwithdignity.org/...

      It exposes a number of shocking medical treatments that we might be subjected to, if we don't expressly prohibit them. It also has beautiful help on choosing options for her funeral. If cogent, she might want input into that.

      Also, forgive me for saying this, but my aunt helped us out re my mom: Visit the funeral home early. Soon. Make as many of those arrangements now as you possibly can. It will also help, because then you will know the people you'll deal with at the time, at least a little.

      Be good to each other. It matters.

      by AllisonInSeattle on Mon May 11, 2009 at 08:45:00 PM PDT

      [ Parent ]

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