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View Diary: My July 4th in prison, or what it really takes to be a foster family (141 comments)

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  •  You're a wonderful man. :-) (8+ / 0-)

    I have 5 nieces and nephews in foster care right now. I don't know where my sister is. I was just in a crying fit yesterday worrying about where they are and what might be happening to them. I don't know why they got taken in the first place. I was living in another state when it happened. I was helping my sister get her life situation together and they were coming back home on Christmas 2006. Suddenly my sister dropped the whole thing, let them stay in the system (she's mentally ill and undiagnosed, I believe) and I haven't talked to her since. My sister is not a drug addict or a terrible parent. Just mood-challenged, poor, lost and probably suicidal right this minute. I just want to find her. :-( I don't talk to my wretched mother at all. I don't know if anybody's alive.

    If I knew they were with somebody like you...but I don't know that. I don't like the facility one of my nieces was in and the foster families of the other ones seemed like opportunists and I couldn't imagine them genuinely loving my nieces and nephews. They're doing it for the check because they're broke. They don't care about kids.

    I wish they could be with you. I can't get them because, like I said, my kids don't live here, I'm technically unemployed and my mental health disqualifies me, I'm in the dark about what happened, nobody tells me anything and I don't know what to begin to do.

    In the WYFP diaries, I never bring these things up but I'm sad everyday. I don't leave the house unless I have to. I'm just so...sick with worry. Thanks for all you do for Jack, two roads. You are an angel.

    •  I just realized... (4+ / 0-)

      I can't get them because, like I said, my kids don't live here

      I didn't mention that. My kids live with their dad because of the school system where he lives. It's very hard to get other people's kids when you aren't the residential parent of your own. I'm in joint custody, formerly the residential parent 5 years ago.

    •  (((((((((((((( GenXangster )))))))))))) (4+ / 0-)

      I know it may seem impossible, but there is hope for a brighter day ahead, really, I know this from deep dark despair turning, with help, to a life of gratitude and contentment.

      Please tell me you have a source of help you are using.  I will check back  a few times today and try to help you find a way to help if not.

      "Bigger change will come with bigger Democratic majorities. Diminishing Democratic accomplishments is a losing strategy." sja May Peace Prevail

      by revgerry on Mon Jul 05, 2010 at 10:19:28 AM PDT

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      •  I don't have any sources, actually. (1+ / 0-)
        Recommended by:
        two roads

        I'm in a feud with my mother, half of my siblings keep going in and out of state to live with her and I keep losing touch with them. I'm bipolar, I have no treatment, half a job, no insurance, unqualified for medicaid, rejected for social security, etc. I have such a rut to climb out of, I can't even see the top. I don't talk to any of my old friends much. I haven't talked to siblings since 2007. I helped my sister get her home together for the kids but the social workers basically ignored me. The red tape is so stupid, they had been gone for so long, only foster people can get the kids, I'm living with my boyfriend who is not going to be my husband as soon as I can get out of here. No abuse, I'm just not living my life with a secret right winger. I have job prospects and hopes to get more money together but it's so slow.

        I'm not sure what can be done.

        My 23 year old brother is getting a lot of inheritance money at age 25. He called me a while ago and asked me about him getting the kids when he gets his money. As far as I know, he's been working on it. We all care about each other as siblings but we don't talk and end up losing touch and it sucks because when you want info, it's not there. They're not in my circle of friends. I guess we remind each other of bad childhood memories. We go off into our friends and don't see each other for years.

        I'm not sure what can be done but you are a sweet person, revgerry. I need more info about what's going on.

        Such angels on DKos. You guys make a child from a former dysfunctional home that doesn't know how to hug feel all "awwwww". I think I need foster parents or something. :-D

        •  You do need a foster or substitute parent (2+ / 0-)
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          two roads, GenXangster

          Hope you will seek this out, from the most formal to the most casual ways to have that. From a little old lady on your block or in your apartment building, or a mentor or set of mentors through a church.

          And you don't have to be highly religious to take help from a church, often they have great programs that really follow through. If it's not a highly controlling fundamentalist church, there are a lot of positive social aspects to it. A built-in community of new friends, mentors, and even parents.

          This health care system is a moral atrocity. Dr. Ralphdog

          by AllisonInSeattle on Mon Jul 05, 2010 at 08:19:12 PM PDT

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