Skip to main content

View Diary: When I Stopped Rewarding My Son for Good Behavior (100 comments)

Comment Preferences

  •  I have never seen "what goes around comes (0+ / 0-)

    around" work in real life.  I was taught to follow the Golden Rule, because my father was a pragmatist. In his experience, it just seemed to work better.  Course, I can't answer for how it works if you don't know right from wrong, never had that luxury.  

    "When fascism comes to America, it'll be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross." Sinclair Lewis

    by lakehillsliberal on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 01:29:20 PM PST

    [ Parent ]

    •  I use "what goes around..." along with the... (0+ / 0-)

      Golden Rule to guide my behavior.  The way I see it, we to a large degree "create our own reality" in how we interact with the world and expect the world to interact with us.  I have the expectation that people will be good and civil, and at least around me (at work, home, and in the other venues of my life) they generally are.

      Cooper Zale Los Angeles http://www.leftyparent.com

      by leftyparent on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 01:45:58 PM PST

      [ Parent ]

      •  You live in a better world than I do. People are (0+ / 0-)

        usually good and civil until something goes wrong and then they are not.  It is every man for himself especially in the corporate world.  You don't ever know someone until you see them in a crisis or an emergency, if they continue to live their principles then you know who and what they are made of.  The day to day stuff is window dressing.  

        "When fascism comes to America, it'll be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross." Sinclair Lewis

        by lakehillsliberal on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 01:53:55 PM PST

        [ Parent ]

        •  Though I have worked for large corporations... (0+ / 0-)

          for the past 20 years, I have been careful to find jobs working for supervisors and on teams where the people seem to be professional and humanistic, and have been mostly successful in that effort.  Out of say a dozen bosses I have had, ten of them have been really good for me to work with and really appreciated my contribution.

          Part of my effort has been to do work that keeps me "below the radar" in lower stress jobs.  For that reason, though qualified, I have avoided management positions which I presume would put me in higher stress situations and require me to work longer hours.

          I think part of that success is bringing this expectation of candidness, and good and civil behavior to my interviews and to my work every day.  Perhaps I have not been hired by people who don't appreciate my world view, and that's been fine with me, though I have probably had to suffer some additional unemployment because of it.  Such are the trade offs I guess.

          Cooper Zale Los Angeles http://www.leftyparent.com

          by leftyparent on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 02:24:30 PM PST

          [ Parent ]

          •  Good strategy...and you may be in a field where (0+ / 0-)

            that works well.  I have not been so fortunate.  I have seen people say and do things that would make your hair curl.  I have managed to avoid most of it but where I couldn't it has taken it's toll.  In the end, it is every man for himself in most situation's because people are just so frightened(especially today) and the one's that aren't are dangerous.   What I have not observed is people standing up in the face of tough opposition.  They just don't do it.  They will mostly go along to get along and tell themselves there was nothing they could do.  It is why bullying is so effect.  

            "When fascism comes to America, it'll be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross." Sinclair Lewis

            by lakehillsliberal on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 02:37:21 PM PST

            [ Parent ]

            •  So you have little control of the quality... (0+ / 0-)

              and ethics of the people you work for?  You are in a business where all the power is with the people who are soliciting your work, and little choice on you own behalf?  The agreement you have with those that employ you does not put you in the position of having any voice or power to change the situation for the better?

              Cooper Zale Los Angeles http://www.leftyparent.com

              by leftyparent on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 03:23:31 PM PST

              [ Parent ]

              •  People who have control have no responsibilities (0+ / 0-)

                they care about, they set themselves to walk away at a moment's notice.  You want to teach your children something important, teach them that.

                "When fascism comes to America, it'll be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross." Sinclair Lewis

                by lakehillsliberal on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 03:58:55 PM PST

                [ Parent ]

                •  That sounds like a pretty bad envionment!... (0+ / 0-)

                  Not sure what more to say.

                  Cooper Zale Los Angeles http://www.leftyparent.com

                  by leftyparent on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 04:35:29 PM PST

                  [ Parent ]

                  •  It wasn't until it was. Long story but the (0+ / 0-)

                    long and short of it, is that the business world as practiced in this country is a heartless place, expecting anything else is to set yourself up to be disappointed.  

                    "When fascism comes to America, it'll be wrapped in a flag and carrying a cross." Sinclair Lewis

                    by lakehillsliberal on Sat Nov 20, 2010 at 04:48:28 PM PST

                    [ Parent ]

                    •  That has been your experience... (0+ / 0-)

                      and I know what you are talking about and have been in those situations as well.  But for the record not all of the business world is heartless.  I have been in corporate environments that were very humanistic, though generally hierarchical.  

                      I think it really depends on the people at the top and who they bring in underneath them.  A humanistic and caring director, in the right environment that supports that, can bring in people for their team with that same energy and facilitate a really positive work environment.  I see it in my current corporate job.

                      So I would disagree with your blanket "the business world", but say instead "much".

                      Cooper Zale Los Angeles http://www.leftyparent.com

                      by leftyparent on Sun Nov 21, 2010 at 07:54:25 AM PST

                      [ Parent ]

Subscribe or Donate to support Daily Kos.

Click here for the mobile view of the site